The Quiet Scream
by Evil Beware We Have Waffles
Summary: He's there. Then he's not. Am I going insane? Is life torturing me? The only thing I know, is that I'm afraid to admit I might be crazy. Because if I'm crazy. They'll take him away. Agnsty Seddie. I do not own iCarly.
1. Chapter One: Prologue

**The Quiet Scream**  
_a Seddie fanfiction_  
by Emma

* * *

**Summary: He's there. Then he's not. Am I going insane? Is life torturing me? The only thing I know, is that I'm afraid to admit I might be crazy. Because if I'm crazy. They'll take him away.**

* * *

**Ship: SEEDDDIE :D**

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Chapter One

I cry myself to sleep for the third time this week. I wake up and my eyes are all swollen ... I wonder if I cried in my sleep. It would seem natural.

Some people thing that I'm not a emotional person. But I always have been, I've just not shown it. My mother always said, "Puckett's don't cry," so I didn't cry.

But I couldn't _not _cry at a time like this. I wouldn't talk to anyone. I had to be alone. See no one. All I wanted was to be with him, but I knew I couldn't be.

I pulled my black hoodie around my small body. I had slowly been withering away. I had been refusing to eat. I know. Me? Not eating? Had the world suddenly come to an end?! To me it has. I felt like I couldn't eat, if I did I could hear his voice, "Wow, Puckett, eating again? You're going to get fat." and my response would have been something like, "Shut up, Benson." nothing more. Then I would have ate it, happily, as he smirked at me.

I stopped at the grey stone, and I gasped. I hadn't seen this stone in three days. And even then I couldn't get to grips what it said on it.

_FREDWARD "FREDDIE" BENSON  
__November 18__th__ 1995 - September 28__th__ 2013  
__We love you._

Tears stung my eyes, but I wiped them away. I didn't want to cry here. Not out in the open.

I remembered the day ... I was at Carly's ... it was supposed to be a normal day ... we were supposed to hang out, watch movies. But when Freddie didn't show up half-an-hour after we told him to, Carly went over to his apartment.

"_He must've fallen asleep." _she had said.

I remember rolling, my eyes, _"That lazy nerd."_

Carly had walked out of the door, and I heard her knocking, about a minute later, I heard a shriek. I ran out the door, to kind Ms. Benson panicking.

"_Where's my baby? Why isn't he there?"_

"_Where did he say he went when you last talked to him?" _Carly had asked calmly.

"_He went to get a smoothie, he had said, 'Going to get a smoothie, then I'm going to Carly's bye.'" _Ms. Benson's voice high and panicky. I had to admit ... I was somewhat scared.

"_Okay, calm down. Let's go to Groovy Smoothie and look for him." _Carly said.

We went to the Groovy Smoothie, and he wasn't there ... Ms. Benson was now hysterical, Carly's worry was growing, and I - on the inside - was freaking out.

We went everywhere, we went to Shane's house, we went to Gibby's house, we went to every one of Freddie's friends we knew about. He wasn't there. They hadn't seen him all day.

The next thing I knew. We had called 9-1-1.

A day later, we heard another scream from the Benson's apartment. Carly and Spencer and I had ran in there, and we found Ms. Benson sobbing on the floor, the phone hanging off the receiver, and small little,_ "Hello? Hello, Ms. Benson?" _coming from it.

I had walked over to the phone and picked it up, _"Hello, sorry, I'm a friend, what happened?"_

"_We have found Fredward Benson. Brown hair, brown eyes, 5'10", does that match a description?"_

"_Y-yes. What's wrong with him?" _I had stuttered.

The next three words shattered my world in one hit. It tore me apart, a claw attacking my chest.

"_Fredward was murdered."_

I let out a hard shriek, causing Carly and Spencer to look at me, I was already sobbing, I felt like dropping the phone.

"_I'm sorry, I'm so, so sorry." _was the last thing the police man said to me, before I handed the phone to Spencer.

"_Sam, Sam! What's wrong?" _Carly asked me, alerted by my behavior.

"_F-Freddie!" _I sobbed, _"he-he's d-dead!"_

Carly and I collapsed to the floor beside Ms. Benson, who took us in her arms. The three of us sat on the floor crying.

"_Who would do that to my baby!" _Ms. Benson cried, _"He was a good boy! Never hurt a fly!"_

None of us knew the answer to that question. All we knew is that he was gone.

The only people who were willing to go and get the body from the police-station were Spencer and I. Ms. Benson couldn't dare to look at it, and Carly had promised to stay by Ms. Benson's side the whole time.

So I went. With Spencer I went to get the body. The body of my best-friend. He was only 18. 18 years old ... not old enough to die. No one's old enough to die.

We entered the station, and the police-man took us to a room, there was a whitesheet.

_Under that white sheet ... is my friend,_ I remember thinking. It made me shudder.

Spencer removed the white sheet, I felt as if I was going to throw up.

Cuts everywhere, blood stained his skin. I couldn't recognize him, I was afraid to.

"_Oh Freddie ..." _Spencer had whispered, covering the white sheet again, as he turned to me, I saw little tears in his eyes, _"C'mon Sam ... let's get all this paperwork done."_

I had nodded and followed him out.

Three days ago was Freddie's funeral. I didn't want to go ... I didn't think I could handle it. But Carly made me go. She said Freddie would've wanted us there.

In my mind I answered, _Freddie wouldn't have wanted to be dead. _

The funeral was sad. Tear jerking, heart stopping, mind blowing.

But the only thing I could think of was how much of a jerk I was to him. How he was really one of my best friends, and I called him, nerd, dweeb, Freddison, Freddifer, Benson, Fredwad, Fredward, Freducinni, Freddork. The list could go on forever.

I was thinking about how the world would never be the same, and how I couldn't think of continuing living without a world with him.

I was thinking about Ms. Benson, having to live the rest of her life, literally alone.

I was thinking of Carly, and how she was his first crush, and how I hated the idea of them together.

I was thinking of Spencer, and how he now had to deal with two grieving women.

I was thinking of Gibby, and how he just lost a very close friend.

I was thinking of Shane, who stayed away from Carly and I the most, and how he never really got to know Freddie the way Carly or I did.

But the thing that I was thinking about the most, the thing that made my heart ache, and my brain bash against the side of my skull. The thing that made my breath shorten, and my spine tingle. The thing that made me clench my jaw, and me want to scream. Was that I never got to tell him, how much, I love him.

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Authors Notes: Hi there! Here's a new fanfiction by me! As you can see, this story is very angsty, and will probably be very science-fiction-y. But still good (hopfully)

I'm not so sure how long this story is going to be, but I'm hoping for at least 15 or 20 ch. I know I want more than 9, which is usually how long most of my stories are. But I'm getting better at writing longer stories *cheers*

Okay, so ... now all there's left to do is press that little magical button that makes me want to update more!

COUGHCOUGhthe review buttonCOUGHCOUGH

**_waiting, (waiting) waitng for my reviews_**


	2. Chapter Two: Three months later

**The Quiet Scream  
**_a Seddie fanfiction  
_by Emma

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**Summary: He's there. Then he's not. Am I going insane? Is life torturing me? The only thing I know, is that I'm afraid to admit I might be crazy. Because if I'm crazy. They'll take him away.**

* * *

**Ship: SEEDDDIE :D**

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Chapter Two

**Three months later ...**

I had cut my hair. It now rested right above my shoulders. Why did I cut it? Because he said he loved my long hair. Last year I said I wanted to dye my hair purple, and cut it to my chin, and he had answered with: _"Sam, don't cut _or _dye your hair. I like it the way it is. It suites you."_

I remember smiling the whole way home.

So now, my hair was short, I had put a blondeish-brownish coulor for highlights, and I wore all black. Carly called me constantly, since I hadn't come out of my room in weeks. I didn't want to talk. I didn't want to see anything. I stayed in my room, with the door closed, the blinds closed, and all electronics off.

Light reminded me of him. Light reminded me of his smile. His smile lit up the room, I remember. I would always remember.

"Sam!" the door burst open causing me to hide under the covers of my room, "Please, Sam, get up! This isn't right!"

Carly walked over to my bed, and pulled of the blanket and gasped, "What did you do to your _hair_?"

"I cut it." I said simply.

"With _what_?"

"A steak knife."

I had cut it with a steak knife, the ends of my hair were all jagged and tattered.

Carly sighed and sat down next to me, "Sam, you really shouldn't be doing this. You should be coming to school, learning. Isn't that was Freddie would have wanted?"

"Would Freddie have wanted to be dead?!" I snapped back.

Carly, who was taken aback by my remark, stood up, "No ... but ..."

"But _what_?! He's dead, yeah! I get that! I don't want to 'just get over it'! I want to stay here, and wallow in my bed."

"But that's not what you should be doing."

"Yeah, but it's what I _will _be doing."

Carly stared down at her shoes, "Please, Sam. Come to school."

"No. I'm staying here, in this bed, for the rest of my life." I said, pulling the covers back over my head.

"Sam ... can ... I still come over here, then?"

"Hm?" I asked poking my head out.

"We're still friends?"

"'Course."

"Then, I can come over ... after school?"

"Sure."

"Sam?"

"Yeah?"

"You're still my best friend, I love you."

"Love you too, Carls."

Then she joined me under the covers.

"Can I tell you about Jacob?" she asked, a hint of a giggle in her voice.

"Jacob?"

"Jacob Stratten. The cute blonde who was checking me out four months ago?" Carly explained.

"Oh yeah ..." I mumbled, "What about him?"

"He asked me out." Carly said with a slight giggle.

"Really? That's great Carls!" I said, giving Carly a weak, but sincere, smile.

She smiled at me back, "Yeah, but I haven't answered yet."

"Why not?"

"I don't know ... just a little weird. You're sitting here at home all day, all sad, and I'm having this perfect life." Carly said, fiddling with her fingers.

"I'm fine ..." I whispered.

"No you're not," Carly whispered back, "I can tell."

"I _will _be." I lied.

"Will you at least come out of your house?" Carly asked, "Your Mom is downstairs, I think she might be worried."

"I don't know ... I haven't been outside in a long time. Three months maybe."

Carly sighed, "Then where'd you get the dye for your hair?"

"My Mom's cupboard." I stated matter-of-factly.

"Sam, promise me you'll be okay. That you'll be able to get over this. I know Freddie's dead, and I _know _he wasn't _asking _to be dead, but he would have wanted you to be happy, and not to be grieving." Carly said, "I have to go. Spencer will probably be wondering where I am."

"Don't forget to say 'yes' to Jacob." I reminded her, sitting upwards in my bed.

"'Course. I'll call you later?" she asked, standing out of my bed.

"Sure. Maybe I'll call you."

Carly smiled brightly at me, before she disappeared through my door. I sat up in my bed, before everything I was feeling before came rushing back to me, in a giant wave of pain.

I sighed, as I looked down at my hands, I twiddled them for a second.

"_Sam ..." _heard a hoarse voice call to me through the wind.

I brought my head up, and I saw him. _Him. _Freddie. I gasped, clutching my mouth with my hand, to prevent me from screaming. But as soon as I blinked. He disappeared himself.

I stared at the wall in shock. Was I hallucinating from lack of sleep? Probably ... I couldn't have saw him. He's dead.

My heart pounded loudly at that thought.

With that I fell asleep.

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Author Note: Thanks for the great reviews on the first chapter guys :) I really hoped you like this one too. Hopefully the next chapter will be up soon.

Emma


	3. Chapter Three: Day 1

**The Quiet Scream  
**_a Seddie fanfiction  
_by Emma

* * *

**Summary: He's there. Then he's not. Am I going insane? Is life torturing me? The only thing I know, is that I'm afraid to admit I might be crazy. Because if I'm crazy. They'll take him away.**

* * *

**Ship: SEEDDDIE :D**

* * *

Chapter Three  
**Day 1**

The light from my window woke me up the next day. I rubbed my eyes as I swung my feet out of my bed.

I thought of yesterday, and how Carly said she wanted me to get out of the house once and a while. So I guess ... I should get out of the house. I grabbed a pair of jeans, and a t-shirt and pulled them over my slim body. I grabbed a black hoodie and pulled that over me. I decided to put my hair up, since I hadn't washed it in a few days. I stared at myself in the mirror. I looked gross, I groaned and sat down on my bed closing my eyes.

"_Sam ..." _

I bolted upwards in bed, my heart was pounding. Was it? No ... no ... it couldn't be. I couldn't have just heard Freddie's voice. I was hallucinating ... again.

I got up from my bed and went down the stairs, my Mom wasn't there, which I expected. She had hardly been in the house, been out with the boyfriend she had that week.

I pulled on a pair of my black converse and tied them tight, and pulled my winter jacket over me, I opened the door. The cold air rushed to my face. I had to admit, I had missed the outside world.

I had started to walk to Carly's counting each step I took.

_34, 35, 36, 37 ..._

"_Sam ..." _his voice called out to me again, this time it was so close, I swore I felt his breath tickling my neck.

I spun around so quickly I almost toppled over. So I started running, I dodged into a dark alley-way and fell to the ground. No one was here. I was alone.

"Okay, calm down ... y-you're just ... depressed, a-and lonely." I told myself, my voice shaky. I wanted to break down there and then.

"Or you're just going crazy, you never know."

I shot my head up. There he was ... _him._

I blinked. He was still there. I rubbed my eyes. He was _still _there.

Tears stung my eyes. Why? Why was this happening? Was my mind and heart tag-teaming to bring me down? Why were they torturing me like this?

"Sam? Are you going to say something?" Freddie said, he sat down next to me.

He still smelt the same. That weird cologne-y smell that I loved was still there, with it's weird hint of cinnamon.

He still had the same dark brown and slightly tousled hair.

"What did you do to your hair?" he asked suddenly staring at my hair, "I told you, I liked your hair long and blonde."

"I-it's still blonde." I whispered, surprised that I could actually answer him.

"Yeah, but it's darker, and _way _shorter. I liked it better long." he answered back to me, he smiled at me, and my heart melted. I had missed that smile, so, so much.

"Yeah ... well that was before ..." I started answering, before I ended my sentence abruptly. "Before ... _what_?" he asked, rasing an eyebrow.

I couldn't bring myself to say it. I just couldn't. He's dead, but he was here in front of me, and that's when something snapped.

"I-I have to go." I said, quickly standing up.

"Ah, going to Carly's?" he asked, getting up to his feet as well.

I didn't even say anything, I just ran, I ran to Carly's house. I needed to talk to her, something was wrong with me. Terribly wrong.

Tears had already started to flow from my eyes, before I even reached Bushwell Plaza.

I burst into Carly's apartment, no one was down in the living room.

"CARLY!" I yelled, tears streaming down my face, as more fell from my eyes, "CARLY!"

Carly ran downstairs at my sudden shrieks, she found my leaning against the door, my breathing hard from all the crying and running.

"Sam! Sam? What's wrong?" she asked, immediately taking me in her arms, and bringing me to the couch.

"I-I saw him!" I sobbed, "I saw Freddie!"

Carly looked at me with a weird face, "You _saw _Freddie?"

I nodded quickly, rubbing the tears away from my cheeks.

"And _that's _why you're freaking out?" she asked, "Sam, I know you and Freddie aren't that great of friends, but this is over the top!"

"W-what? Carly, don't you get it _I saw Freddie_!" I gasped, my head was pounding. What was she going on about?

"Wow! Sam, you're completely over the top! It's _just Freddie_! It's not like he's a ghost or anything. I saw him this morning, I'm not freaking out."

My eyes widened, "So _you're _seeing dead people too?" I asked.

Carly stared at me in disbelief, which quickly turned into anger, "Sam! What are you even talking about! You-you're _sick_! This _isn't _a funny joke, Sam! How could you _say _something like that?! I thought you were actually becoming more of a friend to him!"

"Like what?! Why are you yelling at me? You saw me yesterday, I thought you of all people would understand how I am feeling!" I yelled back at her.

"You're acting like Freddie died or something! That's not a funny joke! What's _with _you today?"

My anger died down. I sucked in a breath ... that ... that was impossible.

"But ... isn't Freddie dead?" I whispered.

"No!" hissed Carly, "What kind of joke is this?"

"No ... it's not a joke ... Carly ... Freddie died ... he died three months ago. Yesterday you came over my house, because I never went outside. Don't you remember?"

"No. Yesterday you and I went to see a movie, then we came back here and ran over some ideas for iCarly _with Freddie_." Carly looked at me suspiciously, "Are you feeling okay?"

"I-I ... n-no I'm not. I ... just had a really weird dream."

"That Freddie died?" Carly asked.

"Y-yeah ..."

"Weird. ... So why did you cut your hair?" she asked.

"Oh ... just ... felt like a change." I whispered back.

This was impossible, I _knew _Freddie had died, this wasn't something I hallucinated. My hair, I cut it because of this death. Something _was _terribly wrong. I didn't know what. And it was scaring me.

Carly sat beside me, munching on some chips. She looked totally normal. I could hardly say sane in here.

The door flew open, and my breath stopped.

"Hiya, Carls. Demon."

"Hi Freddie."

I froze. I couldn't breathe, I didn't dare look up. How is this _possible_? This is _insane_! I couldn't believe this, this is a crazy dream, a really, really crazy dream.

"Sam?"

"Huh?" I turned to look Carly in the eyes.

"Freddie said hi to you."

"Actually, he called me 'demon' I don't really think that's a greeting of any sort I said."

Carly rolled her eyes at me as she turned her attention back to the TV.

"Hi Sam." Freddie whispered in my ear, his breath tickling the back of my neck.

I almost couldn't bear it, I felt the tears starting to fall from my eyes. I couldn't stop them, one by one they fell from the eyelashes.

"Sam?" Carly questioned, "Sam! Sam?"

I buried my head in my arms, I couldn't look at anyone. Something was happening to me, it scared me, I started to gasp.

"Sam!" Carly cried, taking a hold of my arms, "Sam, what's wrong!?"

"I-I can't b-be he-ear!" I yelled, running out of the apartment, hearing Carly's frantic screams after me. But I ran, I ran far out of the doors, I ran down the streets of Seattle until I was lost. I had no clue where I was.

"Why run, Sam?"

I turned around. Freddie. He had been following me?

"H-have you been following me?"

"Yep. You run pretty slow when you're crying," he said, putting his hands in his pockets, "So why _are _you crying?"

"B-because of y-you!" I cried.

"Because of me? _Why_?"

"B-bec-cause! You're d-dead!" I screamed.

"Am I _really _Sam?" he smirked.

"Yes! You are!" I screamed, "You d-died!" I collapsed to the ground, shaking uncontrollably. I couldn't stand this, I just couldn't stand this!

"Sam, I'm here. I'm not dead. Just look at me. Do I look dead to you?" Freddie said, his words ringing through the air.

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Authors Note: So here's the third chapter! :) Just a thanks to all the nice reviews all you guys are giving me. I don't really know how long this story is going to actually be, but I'm shooting for 10 or more chapters.


	4. Chapter Four: Day 2

**The Quiet Scream  
**_a Seddie fanfiction  
_by Emma

**Summary: He's there. Then he's not. Am I going insane? Is life torturing me? The only thing I know, is that I'm afraid to admit I might be crazy. Because if I'm crazy. They'll take him away.**

**Ship: SEEDDDIE :D**

* * *

Chapter Four  
**Day 2**

I rolled over in my bed so I was lying on my back. I stared at my ceiling. Was yesterday a dream? _Could_ it have been a dream?

I got out of my bed and walked over to my calender ... January 15th was crossed off ... Carly came to see me on the 14th ... today was January 16th.

This is insane. This couldn't be happening! Freddie couldn't be alive ... if his death was a dream ... wouldn't my hair be back to normal?

I turned to look at myself in the mirror. No ... my hair was still short.

This ... this couldn't be real.

Yet, I knew it was. There was no mistaking it.

Whatever was going on, it was real. Too real.

It was only about ten in the morning on a Monday morning, Carly would be at school of course. Exactly when I NEEDED her, like REALLY NEEDED her.

But ... if yesterday was real ... would Freddie be alive today as well? The thought made my heart beat faster. If he was alive, I could forget this ever happened, and I could tell him I love him, and everything could go on as normal.

I ran into the shower and quickly got myself clean, I pulled on a pair of jeans, a t-shirt and a wool sweater. I pulled on a pair of the only winter boots that I have, and my winter jacket and started to make my way to Ridgeway High.

Ridgeway was actually about half-an-hour away from my house. That's why I always took a cab ... but I didn't really _feel _like taking cabs anymore.

You never know, it could be a creeper planning their every move to tear you into bloody pieces and then bury you, leaving no evidence or possibly way that they could _ever _find you again. You just ... never know.

When I finally reached Ridgeway I waited until it was 11:20, so that I knew that Carly was having lunch and I could talk to her. And possibly Freddie, at about 11:10 I walked into the school, and there was something new on the wall, something that hadn't been there since I was here last.

A plaque, a shining golden plaque hung on the wall, I walked over to it and my mouth gaped.

_FREDDIE BENSON_

_November 18__th__ 1995 - September 28__th__ 2013_

_Was 18_

_Was a Straight A Student_

_Had Perfect Attendance._

_WILL be greatly missed._

No way. I ... it couldn't ... he couldn't.

WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON!?

The bell rang, and students started coming out of the class rooms, most of them knew who I was whispering things like, "Hey, that's Sam Puckkett." "Man, what's wrong with her?" "She hasn't been at school in, like, forever." "Well it was because of Freddie Benson, there were a few rumors they were going out."

Tears started to fall down my face as I ran to Carly's locker, I sunk to the floor as more tears ran down my face.

"Sam?" I heard Carly's voice call to me, "Sam?!" this time she called in a more panicked voice.

I felt her hand on my knee, and I looked up at her, my eyes tear-streaked.

She took my hand and pulled me up.

"C'mon, let's go."

"G-go where?" I asked.

"Anywhere, anywhere but here." she told me.

She brought me to the park and sat me down beside her on the bench.

"Sam, what's wrong?" she asked, after a few seconds she added, "Well, I _know _what's basically _wrong_, but ... is it just him, or something more?"

"I ... I saw him." I whispered.

"What?"

"I _saw _Freddie, flesh-and-bone, real-life, not a dream," I wiped my eyes on my coat, "You saw him too ... it was yesterday, yesterday the 15th."

"Sam, yesterday I was trying to call you, but there was either no answer, or your Mom said you hadn't come out of your room once, and was sleeping."

I felt more tears coming down my face, and I buried it into my knees.

"It was just a dream Sam ... a very bad dream. You're okay. Come here." Carly whispered, bringing my into her arms.

"I-it was-s s-so re-eal." I sobbed, "H-he was t-there a-and ev-every thing was alr-right."

"Shh, it's okay, I know."

"Don't you miss him too, Carly?"

"'Course I do. But I know that Freddie wouldn't want us like this, wallowing in the nothingness because he was gone. He would want us to be happy. To laugh. To smile." Carly said, "Because he's _always _here in–"

"– In my heart, I know, I know." I rolled my eyes.

"Exactly." Carly said with a comforting smile.

"Why didn't you tell me about the plaque?" I suddenly found myself asking.

"Oh ... well ... I just, decided it would be best. Because you're still taking everything so hard, and ... I just didn't – I'm sorry."

"It's okay. Just a little shocker to come to see to, and find _that _on the wall."

"It's hard to look at it, I know. I still don't." Carly admitted.

"How's Spencer? I haven't seen him in a while." I asked.

"He's good, working on a bunch of new sculptures, like always. But I can tell he still misses Freddie, a lot. We all do."

"And Ms. Benson?"

"Very well, actually. She was kinda – well, like you – for about the first two months, but lately she's been coming over a lot, spending supper. She's not that crazy anymore, I think she realized that she _was_ too overprotective. But she said she's thinking of adopting."

"Really? From where?"

"Japan, or China I think. She wants another boy."

I swallowed, "What does she want to name it?"

"Freddie," Carly said, "Just Freddie, no 'Fredward' or anything."

"Wow."

"Yep."

"Do you think she's actually going to do it?" I asked.

"I think so, not now, but probably in a year or two." Carly said.

I stared at the ground, "I think I'm going to go, you should head back to school." I said standing up.

"Are you sure? If you want we could just hang out, I could skip school."

"No ... you go," I said, "I'm fine, really."

"Okay Sam, bye."

Maybe this was all a dream, maybe my Mom crossed off the date and I just had a dream, a ridiculous, torturous and wonderful dream.

I've always wished I could get over him, that I could go and live my life like Carly or Spencer did now. That I could go fall in love with someone else, and be happy for once.

But I knew I couldn't do that, I knew that I couldn't be happy until I told him. Until I told Freddie that I loved him. But that was impossible, he was dead. Gone. Forever. And I couldn't change that.

* * *

So, here's the next chapter. I hope you liked it :)

Did anyone else notice that they changed fanfiction a little? The review button is different! :O Newer and shinier, and I bet it has hardly gotten clicked upon yet today! So go make that little button happy.

Click it, review it, SEND IT! :)


	5. Chapter Five: Day 3

**The Quiet Scream  
**_a Seddie fanfiction  
_by Emma

* * *

**Summary: He's there. Then he's not. Am I going insane? Is life torturing me? The only thing I know, is that I'm afraid to admit I might be crazy. Because if I'm crazy. They'll take him away.**

* * *

Chapter Five  
**Day 3**

The next day I woke up early. Really early. It only took a few minutes to feel pain in my chest again.

I dragged myself out of bed and went downstairs. Today was going to be a long day ... like every day.

I pulled on a pair of pants, kept my pajama shirt on, and pulled on a wool sweater. I found my winter coat and boots and took a walk.

I've always walked everywhere, to school, to Carly's. I like to think – or I _used _to. There's too much to think about nowadays.

I came up to the Graveyard gates and stepped in. No matter how much it hurt ... I still liked coming to see Freddie. It made me feel ... like he was with me. In some creepy way.

I found Freddie's grave, but someone was already there. It was a woman, standing in a long trench-coat type thing.

It was Ms. Benson. I walked up beside her, she looked down at me and smiled.

"Hello, Samantha." she said quietly.

"I never knew you came here this early." I noted.

"I come here at 7:30 every morning, 12:00 in every afternoon and 8:30 every night. Everyday," she said, "He needs to be visited. So he knows he missed."

"He is missed," I whispered, "He's missed everyday ... he will be missed forever."

"Quite true, Samantha. Quite true."

There was a silence as Ms. Benson put down the daisy she brought her son.

"I hear you want to adopt." I suddenly bursted out.

"Yes I do." she answered simply.

"Why?" I asked.

"Well, why not?" she countered.

I sighed, "Don't you think that it's ... to early? That you're going to fast?"

"No, in fact, I don't think that at all." Ms. Benson said, turning to look at me.

"He was your son!" I cried.

"Yes, and now I want another one."

"B-but ... don't you think that's disrespectful of Freddie?!"

"No ... Samantha. Ever since I was five years old I knew what I wanted to be, I wanted to be a Mommy. I wanted to watch a little child grow up, knowing that they were mine. I wanted to pay for a education, and get grandchildren, and die a happy woman.

"My son died, Samantha. He was killed. I don't get to be a grandmother, I don't get to have grandchildren, or a daughter-in-law, or continue on my family. I won't die a happy woman.

"I want to be a mother. There are so many children in the world, who live without a Mother or a Father, they are alone, and they shouldn't be. So I'm going to adopt, I am going to be a mother, I am going to look after this boy, and care for him to the best of my ability. Though I probably won't make it to see him graduate College or University, I will have raised him, and that will be enough for me."

I looked down at Freddie's grave. Down there was the boy that I loved, and always will love.

"Ms. Benson–"

"Please, Samantha. You don't owe me any certain address, you can call me Marissa."

"Marissa ... I-I ... I really love your son." I whispered.

"I know," she said, "I think he loved you too."

_Not likely ... _I thought.

"I just wished he told you earlier. I think you would've been the perfect girl for him."

"What about Carly?" I muttered.

"He got over her quite quickly, actually." Ms. Benson said, "He never said it to me, but he made it quite clear."

"I'm sorry I didn't ever tell him." I said.

"You obviously have nothing to be sorry about, Samantha. None of this is your fault." Ms. Benson said.

She turned to look at me, her eyes watery.

"Thank you." she said quietly.

"For what?"

"For being a friend to Freddie, he really cared for you and Carly, you should know that."

I nodded my head slowly.

"You were a great friend."

Yeah ... a great friend.

* * *

**Authors Note:**  
Just a short little chapter, I couldn't really think of anything to put in here, all I knew is I wanted Sam to have a talk with Ms. Benson, so I just dove into that. Though I DO know what will be happening the next chapter, so that'll be easier to write that this one.

Soo ... yep, I hope you liked it, and please review! :)


	6. Chapter Six: Day 4

**The Quiet Scream  
**_a Seddie fanfiction  
_by Emma

* * *

**Summary: He's there. Then he's not. Am I going insane? Is life torturing me? The only thing I know, is that I'm afraid to admit I might be crazy. Because if I'm crazy. They'll take him away.**

* * *

**Ship: SEEDDDIE :D**

* * *

Chapter Six  
**Day 4**

I didn't even find Girly Cow funny anymore. Something's seriously wrong with that. Obviously.

My life means literally _nothing _anymore.

Okay, it's true. I've often thought of killing myself – hey, who wouldn't?! – but I decided against it ... I mean, I have Carly, and I just couldn't leave her with no one, and Spencer and ... okay that's all. Still, I couldn't just leave them, they were my life right now. The only thing I could be thankful for.

Cutting didn't seem like an option to me. Tried it, once. It didn't take the pain away, it caused more. So I just ... tried to deal with it.

My cell phone rang on the coffee table, I read the caller ID, it was Carly.

"Hey Carly." I said.

"Hey Sam, why weren't you at school today?" Carly asked.

"You _know _why." I told her.

"No, I don't." Carly said.

"Carly," I started.

"Um ... Sam."

I sat up on my couch, "What do you _mean _you _don't _know why I wasn't there."

"I got to school, you weren't there, I asked Freddie. He didn't know either."

My mind froze. What did she just say?

"W-what?"

"You weren't there. Oh, yeah speaking of Freddie, he wants his science notes back. Could you like, bring them to him? He says he really needs them."

"I don't have Freddie's notes." I said, my voice shaking.

"Yeah, you do. Don't you? Go check your backpack." Carly told me.

I got up shakily, my backpack. The one I had stored away in my closet was lying by the door. Open. I looked inside it, and there were my binders, the ones I was sure I had left in my locker at school.

Then there, popping out of the backpack, were papers, I picked them up. His writing. _His _messy, but elegant script was there. Dated ... _January 4__th__._

No. This ... that ... no.

"Sam?" Carly asked, "Sam!"

"Y-yeah?" I choked out.

"You have his notes right?" she asked.

"Yup ..."

"Can you bring them over or not?"

"Yeah I ... I can bring them over." I said.

"Good," Carly said, "See you soon."

Then she hung up.

*********

I ran to Carly's. Yes, I _ran_. Was I excited? No. Was I terrified of what I was going to find? Hell yeah.

He's alive. Again. How? _How _is he alive? What's going on with me? _Why _is he alive?

I'm insane, I have to be.

Well, maybe I'm in some sort of coma. Yeah, a coma. That's it.

How did I get into this "coma"?

I rushed through the doors of the Bushwell Plaza.

"HEY!! NO RUNNING IN THE LOBBY!" screamed Lewburt.

"WHATEVER!" I yelled in his face.

"!"

Wack job.

I ran up the stairs to Carly's apartment, and came through the door.

"Carly?" I called.

"Oh hey, Sam!" Spencer said with a smile, as he came out of his bedroom door, "Carly said you would be stopping by, she just had to run out. You have Freddie's notes right? He should be over here in a little bit."

I nodded slowly.

"I have a sculpture going upstairs, so I better get back to it."

"Yeah ..." I whispered, "Yeah okay."

"Hey, Sam are you alright?" Spencer asked, taking my shoulder.

I coughed, "Yeah I-I'm fine. Just a little tired."

"Oh, okay. Well, see ya." then he disappeared upstairs.

I stared around Carly's apartment. It was the same, too "the same".

The door slammed shut, and I spun around. There he was. Living, breathing. _Glaring _at me.

"Puckett." he said.

"I ... uh ... B-Benson?" I stuttered.

"My notes?" he asked, holding out his hand.

I reached into my pocket and took out the sheets of paper, I held them out, and he took them from me, our hands brushing against each others, causing me to gasp and jerk away.

He eyed me, "What's your problem today?" he asked me.

"What are you doing here?" I whispered.

"I'm getting my notes." he said matter-of-factly.

"No ... _here_, on this earth." I must sound completely crazy right now.

"Well, my Mother gave birth to me."

I looked up at his face, the face I had missed so much. His brown hair, his brown eyes. His weird geek-y complection. The strange aura he had around him at all times. Like I was safe, but I wasn't safe. I didn't feel safe. I felt vulnerable.

"Freddie, you died." I said.

Freddie's face softened for only a moment before he said, "No I didn't."

"Yes you did." I said, without hesitation.

"Oh, really? Then how am I standing here, Sam?" he asked me with a smirk on his face.

"That was my original question to you."

"Well, here I am."

I glanced at the door, then back to Freddie.

"Follow me." I said, walking out the door.

"Where are we going?" I heard his voice call from behind me.

"Just follow." I snapped.

I walked in silence, I heard his footsteps behind me, and I decided to focus on those.

I walked into the Graveyard, it _had _to still be here, right? It _had _to be.

"Sam, _why _are we in a Graveyard?"

"Because, your grave should be right ... _here_." I gasped. Nothing. Nothing was there. Just grass.

"My grave?" Freddie asked.

My lip trembled and I collapsed on the ground, holding myself, as if I would fall apart.

Tears started falling down my cheeks, one by one, two by two.

"Sam?" Freddie asked, kneeling down next to me.

He placed his hand on my shoulder, but it only stayed there for a second, before I jumped away from his touch.

"Don't touch me!" I shrieked.

Freddie's face grew sad, he extended his arm, and whispered, "Sam, please just come here."

"NO!" I screamed.

He flinched away from me.

"Don't you understand that I can't let you touch me! Because if you touch me, I'll get used to it, and I can't get used to it, because you won't be here tomorrow!"

"Sam, look at me–"

"No I can't look at you either, because that hurts too much! I can't be with you, because it hurts TOO MUCH!"

A few minutes of silence passed, I glanced up at Freddie, he was looking at nothing.

I sniffed, "F-Freddie?"

"I'm hurting you." he whispered.

Then he got up and left in silence, sulking away.

"Freddie?" I called after him.

But he didn't look back.

* * *

**Authors Note:  
**Sorry it took a little longer, I was just procratinating, which hardly ever happens to me.

So, HOW CONFUSED ARE YAH NOW!??! 

Anyways, I hope you liked it.

And if you did.

Review.

_Please? ..._


	7. Chapter Seven: Day 5 & Day 6

**The Quiet Scream**

Chapter Seven

**Day 5-6**

He wasn't there. I didn't check with anyone, but I knew he wasn't here. Alive.

There's some sort of pattern going on. One day he's here, the next two he's not. Then it goes on and on. It tortures me daily, and I want it gone.

I know I seem crazy, but I'm NOT okay? Yeah . . . I'm just, impaired or something. I'm just seeing things that . . . aren't . . . real. Yep. I'm not crazy _at all _. . . . (I hope you caught that sarcasm in the last line.)

Okay, so I _might _be crazy, but that's not really fair, why do _I _have to be crazy? Why is it _me_? Couldn't it have been some hobo on the street?

My cell phone rang on my side table, the screen flashed "Carly" I picked it up.

"Carly, where was I yesterday?" I asked her.

"Um, I don't know, your Mom said you were sleeping," she said, "You're doing a lot of sleeping lately."

"I'm, uh . . . tired." I said.

"Apparently."

"Hey, Carly can I . . . uh, come over today?" I asked her. This was the first time I had invited myself over in months, I used to do it all the time.

"Sure." Carly said. I could hear the smile in her voice.

I bet she thought I was starting to get over it. But, no, how can I get over it when he shows up every once in a while? So, I have a strange feeling, that I'll never get over it, and I'll be getting tortured for the rest of my life. – Oh happy day!

"So, I'll be over in a few minutes, okay?"

"Okay, bye."

"Bye."

I clicked my phone shut and threw it on my bed. I touched my hair, it was so gross and greasy, and so I took a quick shower. I then quickly blow-dried it, not bothering to brush it, I was just going to put it up in a ponytail after. I grabbed a pair of blue jeans and a t-shirt and pulled those on. Then I pulled on a pair of black converse shoes and my coat and headed towards Carly's.

It was still freezing outside, so I breathed on my hands, and then shoved them in my pockets.

Everyday on the way to Carly's, I had to walk passed the graveyard; this time I knew his grave was there. So there was no point in going and reading the horrifying words, which reside on that rock.

I entered through the Shay's apartment door, Spencer was standing in the living room, he was doing some sort of sculpture which he apparently needed anything squishy or sticky. He smiled at me as I came through the door.

"Hey Sam, Carly just went out for a minute, we ran out of milk," he said, "Hey, what do you think of my sculpture, I'm thinking of called it _'A La Gross'_. You think it fits?"

I find myself smirking, "Yeah, it's perfect, Spence."

I suddenly realized how different it felt it here now. It felt airy, and lonely. Sad even. It was hard being in here now, Freddie used to be here, he used to be so . . . alive, and now that was all gone. I knew I would be seeing him again soon, because of my . . . strange sightings. It still wasn't the same, when I saw him, I knew by the end of the day, I would be re-entering a world where he wasn't there anymore.

"Spencer, do you miss Freddie?" I found myself asking Spencer.

Spencer glanced up at me from _A La Gross _and rubbed his neck with his hand, "Yeah . . . 'course I do."

"Yeah, but _how _much do you miss him?"

Spencer put his sculpting tool down and sighed, "A lot. More than I can describe. He was like . . . my best friend, and my little brother. – Like my 'best brother' or my 'little friend'... But, yeah I miss him _a lot_, but what can I do?"

I looked around the lonesome room; then stared down at my shoes, "I just wanted to make sure, because . . . well, sometimes it just looks like I'm the only one who misses him."

Spencer's eyes grew sad, as he looked at me. Maybe it was the very first time he actually realized what was going on with me. That I loved a dead person and that I was grieving. More than a person could grieve over their pet, more than a wife would grieve over her husband.

"Trust me, Sam, you're not. Sometimes I still cry, when I'm alone at might, or when I go upstairs to the old iCarly studio. Don't tell Carly I told you this, but . . . she still cries a lot. I hear her sobbing in the middle of the night. She just wants to be strong, for you, because she thinks she has to."

A breeze blew over me. I _wasn't _the only one, people were just being strong for me. So I could grow strong, so _I _could move passed it.

Only I couldn't, not when the one you're trying to get over shows up every two days, claiming that _no one _is actually dead.

"Spencer . . . I . . . this is kind of difficult to say, but I . . . I saw–"

Just then, the front door flew open, and Carly walked into the room, "Hey guys. Oh, Sam, I see you've met _A La Gross_, interesting, huh?" Carly said, probably holding her breath. _A La Gross _did smell a bit bad.

"Yeah, I met it," I said, shoving my hands into my pockets, "So . . . what do you want to do?" I asked.

"Well, while I was out, I rented us some movies," Carly said with a smile, "Only, the DVD player down here is broken so . . . we'll have to watch it . . . upstairs." she finished carefully.

My heart twinged for a second. I hadn't been upstairs for months. I was afraid of what I would find up there. But, I had to stay strong.

"Yeah, sure," I said, "Let's go."

Carly went upstairs ahead of me, and I pushed myself to climb the stairs. It hurt and not just because the stairs were so steep, just because Freddie had walked up these so many times before. There was still a dent in the fifth stair from when he dropped Spencer's bowling ball last year.

The iCarly studio . . . was so different. It was bare, well almost bare. Carly had apparently bought an old couch, and had plopped it down in the middle of the floor, facing the TV. Freddie tech cart was gone – probably back with Ms. Benson. Our iWeb Award wasn't there anymore either, Carly probably packed it away. It was just . . . weird seeing everything so bare.

"I . . . moved everything out," Carly explained in a whisper, "It was just . . . sad to have it all in here, and it–"

"–Hurt too much," I finished for her, "Yeah, I know the feeling."

Carly glanced at me sideways, "Sam . . . you're okay, right?"

"Y-yeah, I'm fine."

Carly sighed, and looked down at the floor, "Well, we have a movie marathon to start on, don't we?"

I smirked, "Yep."

"Well, let's get started!"

* * *

**I was in a dark room, I couldn't see much around me. But it was dark, and there was a white circle of light on the floor in front of me, sort of like a spotlight. It was far away, but I knew it was a light**

** Suddenly, someone appeared** **in the light, it was a man, he was waving frantically at me, starting to jump up and down. I started to run, and run, and run. He started yelling my name, so I ran harder. Then, I realized who it was. It was Freddie.**

** Freddie grabbed me into his arms, holding me tightly, as if he never wanted to let go, "I don't have much time," he said to me, "Or **_**he **_**will find me."**

** "Who?" I asked.**

** "I can't say," Freddie said, "but just **_**go with the flow**_**, whatever happens, it has to happen. Okay?"**

** I nodded.**

** "I'm sorry I'm hurting you Sam, I never wanted that to happen . . . I thought you would just think what was happening were dreams, and you would go on with it. But you didn't, you took it literally, and now I'm hurting you, I'm sorry. I'm so, so sorry."**

** What was he talking about? Hurting me, dreams . . . he couldn't be talking about . . . no, he **_**couldn't **_**that's not real! It's not real! IT'S NOT REAL!**

** "It's real Sam." Freddie whispered softly into my ear, then he disappeared into a mist.**

I awoke in Carly's room, wearing some of her pyjama pants from the night before. I was breathing heavily, and my palms were sweaty, I wiped them on my sleeping bag, and stood up.

Carly wasn't here, she must've woken up before me. I walked down the stairs into the kitchen, where the smell of bacon filled my nose. For some reason, it made me feel sick.

Spencer smiled at me, "Hey, Carly had to go to school, but she really wants to you stay here for the day, but if you don't want to, you can go home."

"Nah, I'll stay," I told him, sitting down. I was still shaking from my dream.

What was Freddie talking about? _Go with the flow, whatever happens, it has to happen. It's real. _It was starting to freak me out. Was he talking about . . . when he appears to me? It must've been that, it couldn't of been anything else. It was probably just my brain, dreaming things up. Nothing like this could really be happening . . . could it?

"Sam, you know when we were talking yesterday?" Spencer started slowly, I nodded, "You said you saw something, what was it?"

"Oh," I breathed, "it was nothing important."

I had to breath; I had to be calm. Everything would be okay, maybe Freddie wouldn't be there tomorrow, maybe everything to go back to normal... Well, the _new normal_.

I couldn't think of this anymore. It was starting to terrify me, what may or may not happen.

_Go with the flow, whatever happens, it has to happen. It's real._


	8. Chapter Eight: Day 7

**The Quiet Scream  
**_a Seddie fanfiction  
_by Emma

* * *

**Summary: He's there. Then he's not. Am I going insane? Is life torturing me? The only thing I know, is that I'm afraid to admit I might be crazy. Because if I'm crazy. They'll take him away.**

* * *

Chapter Eight  
**Day 7**

I sat upright in my bed, leaning against the wall, my hands tightly around my legs. I decided, if I stayed here, I wouldn't have to see him. Since I knew he was here, I _knew _it. The world just seemed to have this strange happy feeling when it was here, and I could feel that feeling through the air.

Maybe I was wrong, maybe he wasn't here. Maybe, my guess I had yesterday was correct, maybe everything would go back to normal – my normal.

Who am I kidding? He's here. It's too obvious. It's hard to describe, but he is here. It's that feeling in the air, I guess.

I glanced at my cell phone on my side table, it was a Monday morning, and Carly would be at school . . . which means Freddie would be at school. It was getting close to two in the afternoon, there was no point in even showing up today. I could go to Carly's, see Freddie, freak out then leave. . . . Nah, that'd just be too weird.

I lied down in my bed, and sighed. What was I supposed to do about this? Live with it, go every third day with Freddie living, and then be depressed and lonely the rest of the time? No way, that'd be complete torture. I either want him gone – which I really don't want. Or I want him alive – which is completely impossible.

Life officially sucks.

My phone buzzed, and I picked it up, it read: _One new text message_. I picked it up and read it.

**Carly S: hey, were u sick again?**

I sighed, but texted back, **yah . . . did I miss anything?**

I got an answer within minutes:

**Carly S: not really . . . freddie asked where u were though, it was kinda weird.**

My heart thudded. Freddie wanted to know where I was. Why? Then I remembered something.

"_I'm hurting you."_

He seemed so upset then . . . he didn't really say why. He kinda just . . . left. The old Freddie would have never cared if he was hurting me or not, since I hurt him so much. He would be jumping off the walls if he actually hurt me, thinking he finally won, one of our battles. The thought made me smile. That nub never won.

My bedroom door burst open, causing me to jump about ten feet in the air. My jaw dropped at who was standing in the doorway. Freddie.

"What the _hell_?" I screamed at him.

"S-sorry, I tripped." Freddie said, stepping through the doorway, "I . . . uh, saw you weren't at school today,"

"Freddie, I would appreciate it if you left," I whispered, glancing up at me, he gave me this look as if he thought I was completely crazy – which I probably am.

"Why?" he asked, leaning against my wall.

"Because I want to pretend you're not real," I said.

"Ha ha, Sam. Very funny, I get it, this is one of you're stupid ways to insult me, isn't it?" he said, with this fake tone of voice, which made me doubt was he was saying.

"Freddie . . . this isn't a joke," I said, closing my eyes shut, "I just . . . can't be near you, okay?"

Freddie said nothing, I kept my eyes shut. I was begging for him to move his feet, and leave me in peace. But there was no sound, not even the sound of him breathing . . . as if he wasn't.

"You're dead, I know you're dead," I said "You're here one day, and then you're not. I want to know why."

Freddie sighed, I heard him shift his feet, as he walked across my bedroom, he held his face to his hands, for only a minute, before turning and answering me.

"I . . . I can't tell you why, but . . . yes, I am dead."

It took a second for me to catch my breath, I couldn't believe what he just said . . . _he just said he was actually dead_. I didn't expect him to agree.

"W-what?" I asked, I needed an explanation.

"I can't say," he whispered.

"Why not?" I snapped.

"I just can't!" he cried at me, "I don't even know why I'm here. I was murdered, and the next thing I know, I'm alive, with orders to pretend as if my murder never happened."

I started to slowly back away from him, he was starting to scare me. I wanted to be away from him.

"Sam, stop, please no, you can't be afraid," he begged me, his face had grown soft, he looked as if he wanted to cry, "Please don't be afraid of me, I'm not here to hurt you, that's the very last thing I _ever _wanted to do."

I found myself doubting his words. I mean, he was dead . . . he could have orders to lie to me, if he had orders to pretend his death never happened.

"I don't know how long I'm going to be here, I don't know _why _I'm here, but I could leave at any second. You heard me, yesterday . . . _your _yesterday. When you were at Carly's, I contacted you, and you heard me."

I rubbed my temples, "The dream . . ." I whispered.

"That _was _me, it wasn't a dream – well it was, but it was a contacting dream," he explained, "I had to contact you, so I put myself in your dream."

"Freddie . . . I really miss you," I said to him, standing up.

"There has to be something that you never told me in my lifetime, maybe that's why I'm here."

I understood now, maybe this was why he was here. For me to tell him I loved him, for me to get a chance. So I could move on, and get on with my life, so Carly doesn't have to protect me anymore.

"Freddie," I said, walking up, so I was facing him, "I love you, I always have."

Freddie let out a shaky breath, then pulled me tightly into his arms, "I knew it, I knew I should've told you when I had the chance."

"Told me what?" I asked in a whisper.

"Sam, I love you too, it's not past-tense, it's present. Even when I'm gone through this world, I'm still _always _with you, I'm still _always _watching over you. I love you, I wish I told you."

He cupped my face, and planted his lips right on time of mine, giving me pure bliss, a bliss I hadn't experience since my first kiss . . . with Freddie.

The words started to ring through my head, he loved me. He really did love me. It was true . . . and I didn't tell him. I'm such and idiot.

"Sam," he said, pressing his forehead to mine, "Can you do one thing for me?" he asked.

I nodded, "Anything."

"Go to school tomorrow,"

I hesitated, "I don't know want to."

"I know, but I _need _you too, okay?" he said with a smile, "Promise me you'll go tomorrow."

I sighed, "Alright, I promise."

Here I was in his arms, the place I never thought I'd ever be, yet here I was. Yet it was real . . . or it didn't feel real, because I knew by the time tomorrow, he would be gone.

He's there. Then he's not. Am I going insane? Is life torturing me? The only thing I know, is that I'm afraid to admit I might be crazy. Because if I'm crazy. They'll take him away.

* * *

**Authors Note  
**I'm actually surprised at how fast I got this chapter up! XD I know it's not one of my best, I really didn't have much to fit in, but I hope you liked it anyways.

Love,  
Emma


	9. Chapter Nine: Day 8

**The Quiet Scream  
**_a Seddie fanfiction  
_by Emma

* * *

**Summary: He's there. Then he's not. Am I going insane? Is life torturing me? The only thing I know, is that I'm afraid to admit I might be crazy. Because if I'm crazy. They'll take him away.**

* * *

Chapter Nine  
**Day 8**

"_Go to school tomorrow,"_

But I didn't _want _to! I mean . . . I hadn't been there in almost four months, I would be behind on everything. What's the point of going, if I'm just going to fail everything anyway?

Yet here I was, standing outside Ridgeway's front doors. Debating whether or not to go in. Kinda like Cameron Frye in _Ferris Bueller's Day Off_.

Kids were still talking about me. When they walked by, they'd whisper and point, like I was some kind of caged animal.

_Move one foot, then the next. Move one foot, then the next._Soon enough I was in front of my locker. It took me a while to figure out my combination (because I've forgotten it) but I then quickly got my books for English class – perfect, let's start off my day with Ms. Briggs!

I closed my locker, and went to Ms. Briggs room, she was already at her desk, and the rest of the class room was deserted. I took my usual seat and sat down. I could feel Ms. Briggs' eyes on me the whole time. I had a feeling she would start yelling at me for not coming to school.

"Sam," I suddenly heard her say, "How are you?"

I stare and look up at her, it sure was Ms. Briggs. She didn't look all that different . . . just older. I guess it _has _been a long time since I came here.

"Oh . . . I'm good." I said, twiddling my thumbs.

Ms. Briggs hesitated before she spoke again, "I make you do all the work you missed," she said, as my eyed widened, "I know, I know. It's not of my nature. But . . . you lost a friend. . . . Mr. Benson – Freddie – was a good kid, it wasn't fair what happened to him," I felt tears brimming the sides of my eyes, but I blinked them away.

"Thanks . . . Ms. Briggs," I whispered.

Ms. Briggs patted my arm and smiled at me. She gazed up, and her normal scowl came upon her face, "MR. GIBSON!" she yelled, "WHAT HAVE I TOLD YOU ABOUT NOT WEARING A SHIRT?" she then stood up and started after poor Gibby, who smiled and waved at me, then started sprinting down the hall.

Student began to come in, their eyes wide that I actually _came _to school. They all knew, I _knew _they knew. Who _wouldn't _know? He's dead . . . he was killed. I love him. And he loves me. I felt a smile form on my face, as I remembered the night before.

"Sam?" I heard Carly's voice call behind me, "Sam? You're here? At _school_?" she asked.

I shrugged, then nodded, "I guess I am."

Carly took me in a tight hug, "I'm so glad you're finally starting to live again!" she whispered into my ear.

Yeah . . . live, that's an interesting word.

The rest of the day consisted of Carly being over the moon that I was actually there. She tried to tag along to _all _my classes . . . even the ones she wasn't in.

The hardest class for me was science. I was lab partners with Freddie . . . I almost had to dismiss myself, just so I could cry in the girls washroom. People were staring at me more than ever, and I felt lonelier than ever. It felt like just yesterday, we were having arguments over what to do an experiment one I remember the most, is the one we had two weeks before his death.

**I had been slouching on the table, and I could feel Freddie's scowl on me. **

"**Sam, c'mon get up, we have to work on this project. Or we're gonna fail." he said to me.**

"**Who cares?" I mumbled, "I don't."**

**Freddie had groaned, "Well **_**I **_**do! Now work!"**

"**Shut up, Freddinkleworth, I'm sleeping," I said, placing my index finger over his lips.**

**He rolled his eyes at me, and shoved my hand away, "Seriously Sam! What are we going to do our project on?"**

"**I dunno, frogs?" I suggested.**

"**Frogs?" he asked with a raised eyebrow.**

"**Yeah, we could like, dissect them, so I could cut open a frog! We haven't done that yet in class!" I had said.**

"**We've already done that, you skipped that day," he told me, with a goofy grin on his face, that said "Aha! Gottcha now!"**

"**What! Aw man . . . **_**shit **_**I missed it," I whispered to myself.**

**I heard him snicker, so I punched him in the arm. Hard. He fell off his chair, and I laughed.**

So, it wasn't really an _argument_. More like a loud discussion. But it's hard to think that a boy like that got . . . murdered, only two weeks later.

After my science class, school was over, so I quickly packed my bags – not bothering to take home my homework – and started walking home, when I saw Gibby sitting on a bench waiting for the bus.

"Hey," I said, sitting next to him.

Gibby smiled at me, "Hey Sam, it's nice that you're here," he said, "Carly and I really missed you . . . and Reuben."

"Oh god . . ." I whispered to myself.

Gibby smiled, "It's been sorta . . . lonely."

"Without me?" I asked him, Gibby was usually always afraid of me.

"No . . ." Gibby said, "Without . . . Freddie."

I froze for a second. I had forgot that Gibby was basically Freddie's best friend . . . best _male _friend. I actually hadn't spoken or _seen _Gibby since Freddie's funeral.

"Oh," I whispered, "Yeah . . . it is."

"Tasha and I broke up," Gibby then sort of blurted out of nowhere.

I remembered Gibby and Tasha . . . they had been together for _years_, Carly and I always joked how they would get married and have little Gibby children. It was weird thinking of them being apart.

"Really? How come?"

"She didn't understand how I was feeling, about Freddie's death. I lost a best friend, and it's hard to get over," Gibby explained to me.

I sighed, "I know . . . I couldn't imagine living without Carly . . . especially now."

Gibby looked at me, and then the bus rolled up, he shrugged and stood up.

"See ya Sam, bye," he said.

"Bye, Gib," I waved to him.

He boarded the bus; I started on my way home. I _could've _taken the bus too, but I really didn't want to. I just wanted to walk. Be alone.

It took me about ten or fifteen minutes to get home, and when I did. I sensed something wasn't quite right.

I turned the corner to my house, and then I saw it. The door was busted open, like someone had forced their way through the door . . . or kicked it.

Oh my god.

I ran into my house, everything – and I mean _everything _–was tossed everywhere. The papers off the shelf. The food out of the pantries. The TV looked as if it was carefully picked up off the table, and placed in the floor.

My Mother's secret stash of money was open, but it was all there. Every single penny.

I ran upstairs to my room, and searched around. My money, my PearPod, my cell phone, my phone in general. It was all there. Except for one thing. A picture I had on my wall. It was a picture of Carly, Spencer, Freddie and I about a year ago. We were all smiling, with our arms around each other. It was gone. My picture was gone.

I couldn't believe it. My house had been broken into.

* * *

**Authors Note  
**GASP.

Okay, so Sam's house has been broken into, and only one thing has been taken, a picture of her, Freddie, Spencer and Carly. I want you to PLEASE put in your review, who you think broke into Sam's house. It's no one you know, it's someone that hasn't been introduced. Please guess, even if you just put "I don't know, leave me alone woman!" or something.

Oh, and HeCalledHerCass (Sarah) - YOU can't guess. Because you already know! (Hey, guys, Sarah goes to my school, she's my buddy. LIVE WITH IT! ;D)

BTW, this week is a pretty busy week for me at school, the 24th is my Grade 8 Graduation, and on the 30th my family is leaving for a vacation until July 18th. I know, it sucks. So you might not get a update until July. SORRY! :(

That's all for now,

Thanks,  
Emma


	10. Chapter Ten: Day 8 cont & Day 9

**The Quiet Scream  
**_a Seddie fanfiction  
_by Emma

* * *

**Summary: He's there. Then he's not. Am I going insane? Is life torturing me? The only thing I know, is that I'm afraid to admit I might be crazy. Because if I'm crazy. They'll take him away.**

* * *

Chapter Ten  
**Day 8 cont. - 9**

I sat in the police station, with my hands folded in my lap, waiting for a detective to come. I had called my Mother, but she had her cell phone off, and it looked like she wasn't home during the break in. Which was good.

I still couldn't believe it. My house, _my _house, had been broken into, nothing but a picture of my friends and I was gone. And coincidently I was at school when it happened. . . . Wow.

"Okay, Ms. Puckett," a man in a police-man outfit came up to me. He had dark hair, and kind eyes, but a firm serious face. When he saw me, I saw his face melt. Like he felt sorry for me. Who wouldn't?

"You can call me Sam," I told him, "Everybody does."

The detective nodded, and held out his hand, "Okay, Sam, my name is Officer Darren Ferris. I'm going to ask you a few questions about the break in to your house."

I nodded, and crossed my leg over the other, trying to be comfortable, I had a feeling this was going to be awhile.

"So, where were you when this happened?" Officer Ferris asked me.

"At school, it's my last year of high school." I told him.

"Your school records say you've been absent for quite a while, care to explain?" he said to me, rasing an eyebrow. Great, he went into full Detective mode now. _Fun_.

"I . . . didn't want to go," I said quietly.

"How come?"

"My friend died," I said – How did he _not _know this?

Officer Ferris looked at me closely, then checked his paper work, "You're Samantha Puckett. Fredward Benson's friend, aren't you?" he said.

I nodded.

"Oh, well . . . then you staying away from school isn't as curious as I thought. . . ." I heard him mumble to himself. I pretended as if I didn't hear him.

Ferris scratched his head, "We don't seem to have any interviews on Mr. Benson's case from you. Did no one give you a call?"

"No, I got calls . . . I just didn't want to talk about said it was fine, because Spencer, Carly and Marissa Benson all said they were with me the day of his . . . disappearance." my voice cracked.

"Well, do you mind answering a few questions for the record–?"

"– Sorry to interrupt, sir, but my house was just broken into, I would like to get back to that fact." I said, probably a bit to snappishly. I just really didn't want to talk about Freddie yet. I knew I'd start getting calls from the police department again, though.

Ferris nodded, "I understand you live with your Mother, have you contacted her yet?"

"Her cell phone is off . . . I think she's at work today." I lied. My mother wasn't really _working_, she was probably off somewhere, being drunk, making out with some drunk bastard. The only money my Mother got was a care package from my Dad, for _my _well being. That was the reason I always used to eat at Carly's house. . . . Lately I haven't been eating though.

"Okay, so no one was home when the incident happened, and nothing was stolen?" Ferris said.

I nodded, "Well . . . one thing was stolen. It was a picture of my friends and I. Carly and Spencer Shay, and Freddie, it was the only thing that was gone."

"A picture?" Ferris whispered to himself, "Okay, Sam. Thank you. Currently we have the police station at your house, trying to get finger prints. Do you have anywhere to go for the time being. You won't be able to get your things out of your house, but you need somewhere to stay. Your Father is your emergency contact, do you want to call him?"

"Oh, no, no. I can stay with Carly Shay, I usually hang out there anyway." I said. My house was officially being searched by police men. And I didn't have any clothes. Great.

"Okay, do you want a ride there? I could give you one," Ferris said, reaching into his pocket for his car keys.

"I'm okay, it's fine. I can walk, I like to walk," I told him standing up, and shaking his hand.

"Thank you, Sam, we'll call you once we have progress."

I nodded, and left the police station.

My life completely and utterly , the love of my life dies. Second, I start seeing this love of my life, further confirming that I am, indeed, crazy. Thirdly, my house gets broken into, so I don't have any of my belongings what so ever, and he/she takes the ONLY photograph of Freddie I have.

I mean, I know in two days time, I'll see Freddie again. But . . . that Freddie never looked truly like he was dealing with being here, alive. He didn't want to be alive . . . he wanted to be able to pass on, so he could be truly happy.

Then, something inside me snapped shut. If I hadn't gone to school today, I would've been _in the house _when the brake in happened. That person could've been dangerous . . . he could've stabbed me, or . . . _killed me_. But I wasn't at home, I was at school because . . . _Freddie told me to_.

"**Sam," he said, pressing his forehead to mine, "Can you do one thing for me?" he asked.**

**I nodded, "Anything."**

"**Go to school tomorrow,"**

**I hesitated, "I don't know want to."**

"**I know, but I **_**need **_**you too, okay?" he said with a smile, "Promise me you'll go tomorrow."**

**I sighed, "Alright, I promise."**

I stopped cold in my tracks. Freddie had saved my life.

"**Even when I'm gone through this world, I'm still **_**always **_**with you, I'm still **_**always **_**watching over you."**

I needed to talk to Freddie. I needed to talk to him now. He said he needed to talk to me, so he contacted me through a dream.

I started to run, I needed to get to a bed I picked up my pace, and sprinted down the street as fast as my legs could carry I got to Carly's I burst through the door, causing Carly to jump literally five feet in the air.

"AAH! AAAH! HOT COFFEE! HOT COFFEE!" I heard Spencer scream.

"I . . . uh, need a bed," I explained, "I'm really tired, I'll explain tomorrow, promise!" I said, running up the stairs to Carly's room, where I jumped into her bed, and shut my eyes tight.

"Please Freddie, contact me tonight." I whispered, I had to get to sleep, right now.

* * *

I awoke with my air disheveled. I hadn't dreamt anything. _Nothing _what-so-ever.

GOD FREDDIE, WHY DON'T YOU FREAKIN' CONTACT ME WHEN I NEED YOU!

I slipped out of Carly's bed. Carly had put up the spare bed, she was already out of bed, probably downstairs. Or at school.

I walked down the stairs where Carly was waiting for me.

"Sam!" she cried, "Your house was _robbec_?" she shrieked at me.

"No! It was _broken into_ . . . there's a difference!" I said.

"Why didn't you tell me about this yesterday?" Carly asked me, obviously upset.

"I had to get to sleep!" I insisted.

"And _why _was it so important to get to sleep?"

I opened my mouth to speak, but then realized me saying: _"I needed to get to sleep so Freddie could contact me via a dream, because he saved my life from the person who broke into my house!" _would make me sound like a complete wack-job. So instead I said: "I was just really tired . . ."

Carly sighed, "Okay, whatever, I'm late for school. You coming?"

I shook my head. I needed to find a way to contact Freddie.

Carly nodded, "Okay, see ya after school."

I waved as she disappeared through the door.

Spencer came through his bedroom door and turned on the TV. I walked over to him and sat down, playing with the strings on my sweater.

"So . . . I have a random question for you. It really doesn't mean anything, like, I seriously wouldn't be _doing _it or anything, like seriously. But I was just wondering . . . if you knew how to contact invisible beings?"

Spencer turned his head and looked at me, with an eyebrow raised, "You mean, like a ghost?"

"Yeeaahh . . . ."

"Well, you could use a Ouiji board."

A _Ouiji board_! Yes, that would work!

"We have one upstairs in that closet in the hall . . ." Spencer's voice trailed up as I ran upstairs.

I found the closet, and started to tear through everything, until I found it. Once I did, I ran upstairs to the empty iCarly studio and set the board up. Once I was there. I started to talk.

"Freddie? Are you there?" I asked it.

Suddenly, the little Ouiji marker thing started to move over three letters: **Y-E-S **

* * *

**Authors Note  
**So I lied. I was able to get another chapter. The next that will just be Freddie and Sam's Ouiji conversation. (Oh BTW, if you don't know how to say "Ouiji" it's Wu-gee) So it'll probably be short.

Hey, guys, just one quick question. After this story is done, what do you think of The Quiet Scream in Freddie's POV (Like, a sort of prequel-type-thing, with the same dialogue. But little extra chapters with Freddie talking to the person who's making him do all this stuff.) If you're interested in something like that, please leave a "Yes" or "No" in your review. (Well, more than that . . . but you know what I mean)

Sam and Freddie talking via Ouiji will probably be the last chapter before I have to leave to go to Nova Scotia, P.E.I Montreal. All these places in Canada.

'Cuz I'm Canadian, eh?


	11. Chapter Eleven: Day 9 cont

**The Quiet Scream  
**_a Seddie fanfiction  
_by Emma

* * *

**Summary: He's there. Then he's not. Am I going insane? Is life torturing me? The only thing I know, is that I'm afraid to admit I might be crazy. Because if I'm crazy. They'll take him away.**

* * *

Authors Note: I made a mistake guys, Ouiji is actually said as "WEE-GEE" :)

Haha, WHOOPS! :D

* * *

Chapter Eleven

**Day 9 cont.**

I stared, my eyes huge, at theOuiji board. Did I _seriously _just see that? Seriously? Lately, I couldn't of been trusting what I'm seeing. (I mean, I've been seeing Freddie Benson, my friend who _died_.)

"Freddie?" I stuttered, "You can see me, you can hear me?"

Slowly the wooden thing moved, spelling, **Y-E-S-A-N-D-Y-E-S. **

I found myself smiling, "Are you near me?"

**Y-E-S**

He was right, he was near me. He was always watching me, he was watching over me. All the time.

"Where are you?" I asked.

There wasn't an answer. The only thing I heard was Spencer making one of his sculptures. the breeze rushing passed me, blowing my hair back. Yet . . . there wasn't a window open in here, there was no air strong enough to blow my hair back.

"You can only answer 'yes' or 'no' questions, can't you?" I sighed.

**Y-E-S**

"That sucks . . . stupid Ouiji board, stupid, nubbish Ouiji board." I muttered crispily.

I swear I heard the sound of a chuckle through the wind.

I closed my eyes, and twiddled my fingers.

"Are you beside me?" I asked, opening my eyes.

**N-O**

"Are you behind me?" I asked.

**N-O**

"Are you . . . in front of me?"

I waited for the wooden thing to move, to tell me yes, or no. It took a minute for the wooden thing to actually start moving, like Freddie was slowly, it eventually made the answer that literally made me have to catch my breath.

**Y-E-S**

"Like right now?" I whispered.

**Y-E-S**

"Seriously?"

**Y-E-S**

"Seriously, seriously?" I asked.

**Y-E-S**, I could almost hear Freddie's annoyed tone.

Suddenly it got very quiet again.I stared down at my hands. One thing I'd been longing for, was his touch. When he was living, whenever our arms brushed against each others, I always treasured it. Because I hardly ever got to be in his arms.

"Freddie . . . are you able to touch me?" I asked.

I waited for the wooden thing to move, slowly, and silently, it did. My heart dropped when I saw the answer.

**N-O**

For some reason, I felt water form in my eyes. As if it just hit me now. Freddie was dead. I'm seeing him. My house had been broken into. I technically have no home. My mother is a drunk.

"Can't . . . can't you _try_?" I whispered. I was begging, I wanted him, his touch. His _real _touch. Two days ago seemed like a dream, like it never really happened. And, truthfully, it didn't. He was a figment of my imagination of some sort. I didn't want him to leave. But I didn't want him to stay. I wanted his _real _touch.

**Y-E-S **read the Ouiji board.

My heart picked up. Would it work? _Can _it work? As much as I wanted it to work, I was afraid for it to work. And if it didn't, he would've touched me . . . and I wouldn't of felt it.

The more I thought about it, the more I got nervous, the more I was afraid for it to happen. The more that I maybe . . . _didn't _want it to happen.

Suddenly, a strange sensation came over my right hand. It started to tingle, and twitch every now and then. And for a flash of a second, I swore I saw something there. And I smiled.

"You'retouching my right hard, aren't you?" I asked with a smile.

**Y-E-S **read the Ouiji board.

Finally I decided it was time to get down to business, to start askingabout the break in.

"Freddie, do you know who broke into my house?"

**Y-E-S**

I sighed, "Are you going to tell me _who_?"

**P-O-S-S-I-B-L-Y**

I rolled my eyes, then realized something, "HEY! That wasn't a 'yes' or a 'no'!"

No answer.

Damn him and his ghostly appearance. If he wasn't invisible . . . and dead, I would've punched him in the face.

"Is the person who broke into my house . . . important?" I asked. I don't know exactly _why _I did, I really don't know where that question came from. I just suddenly had a feeling, that who ever it was. He or she, was important.

The answer from Freddie came slower than usual this time. Like he was playing with me.

**Y-E-S-H-E-I-S-Q-U-I-T-E-I-M-P-O-R-T-A-N-T-I-N-D-E-E-D**

* * *

**Authors Note:  
**Okay, so THIS is the last update before I leave. Because I'm leaving tomorrow. July the 1st. :)

So, I was surprised that this chapter was actually long, because I expected it to be very short. But it's long . . . ish. Longish.

NOW the story starts getting REALLY intense. And once I get back from my trip, I'm sure I'll be updating once a week. With all the free time and all.

Okay, so at the end of ch.9 I asked you guys who you thought broke into Sam's house, and these are the answers I got:

-Freddie in ghost form.  
-Freddie's dad.  
-Freddie murderer/-ess.  
-Nevel.  
-Mandy.  
-Missy.

Just to tell you. ONE of these answers is ACTUALLY correct. When I saw that answer in the review I was like, "WOW! Someone ACTUALLY guessed it!"

But I'm not going to tell you what answer is correct.

Why?

Because I'm a horribly, evil, cruel person. ;)


	12. Chapter Twelve: Day 10

**The Quiet Scream  
**_a Seddie fanfiction  
_by Emma

* * *

**Summary: He's there. Then he's not. Am I going insane? Is life torturing me? The only thing I know, is that I'm afraid to admit I might be crazy. Because if I'm crazy. They'll take him away.**

* * *

Chapter Twelve  
**Day 10**

**I had a dream that night, that I was running. Running in darkness, the only thing I could see was myself. I was crying, and screaming, only I couldn't hear what I was screaming. It was like I was deaf.**

**There was something after me, I wasn't quite sure what it was, but out of the darkness came a giant grey hand, the fingernails grimy, and dirty, filled with mud, dirt, sticks, and the most grotesque of all. . .human body parts.**

**Just as the monster was about to come out of the shadows, I screamed, – this time I heard it. Loud and clear, an ear-piercing shriek. A sound that could break anything, a window, a mirror, a wine glass, your ear drum. Then, I woke up.**

I was sweating really hard, I felt as if I was soaked. That nightmare, was really freaky. What was with that grey hand? With the – I gulped – dead bodies in it? Were they even dead? I thought one or two may have twitched. Gross.

I looked around the room I was in. Carly's room, so I had slept over at Carly's in the alternate universe too. Or whatever this other world is called, where Freddie is alive. Or . . . alive-ish or whatever.

Speaking of Freddie, I was still completely freaked out, about our Ouiji-conversation the night before. The thief – or un-thief since he really didn't steal anything . . . other than a picture. The _un_-thief, is important. Important in what though? I could've of asked that question though . . . because it's not a "yes" or a "no."

After I had gotten the strange answer from Freddie, Spencer had burst into the room, wondering why I even needed the Ouiji board. I couldn't tell him that I was talking to Freddie, so I lied. I told him that I was just fiddling around with it. Spencer didn't believe me, said that I knew better than to play with a board that can contact spirits. So I made up a new lie, I said that I was trying to contact my grandmother's dead parrot. Spencer shrugged – believing me – and left.

I decided I had to leave then, so I quickly said bye to Freddie and packed away the Ouiji board. Then watched Girly Cow for the rest of the day. Silently, flipping out.

I slipped out of Carly's bed and walked downstairs. Carly was down there, cooking food. Like, eggs, and ham, and other breakfast-y foods. It smelt good . . . really good. Though at the same time, it made me sick to my stomach.

"Hey Sam," Carly said, as she saw me come around the corner, "Good morning to you, the ham and eggs are ready, I already put some on the table for you."

Suddenly, I _did _feel sick to my stomach, and the next thing I knew, who-knows-what was upchucking out of me.

"Oh my God!" Carly cried, running over to me, "Spencer!" she yelled.

Spencer came bounding out of his room, "Woah – whaa?" he called, then he saw me, and ran somewhere else.

Spencer appeared again with a bucket, and held it under me, just as the throwing up was gone.

Carly and Spencer helped me over the puddle of sick now on their floor and lied me down on their couch.

"God, Sam, are you okay? You were perfectly fine yesterday," Carly said, feeling my forehead, "You don't have a fever," she mumbled.

"Sorry . . ." I whispered, "I don't know what happened."

Carly smiled at me, "It's fine, Spencer will clean it up."

"Aw man!" I heard Spencer whine softly from the back.

Carly smirked, "Just watch some Girly Cow, I'm going to dispose of the breakfast," she said standing up.

I nodded and reached for the TV remote, just as the door opened, and Freddie walked it. He saw the pile of upchuck, and his nose wrinkled.

"What happened here?" he asked.

"Sam threw up," Carly expalined, as she started scraping the breakfast into the trash can.

Freddie glanced at me quickly, then rolled it eyes, "Smooth, Puckett," he said.

I looked at him confused for a second, but then I realized, we "hated" each other in this world.

I gave him my best death glare, "Shut it, Freddith." I snapped.

Freddie walked over behind the couch, then whispered in my ear, "Are you okay?"

I nodded quickly.

"Well, your house hasn't been broken into here."

Once again, I was confused. Why would he tell me that? Then I would be alone at my house, sick, and . . . . Oh. Freddie wanted to talk to me. Alone. So I had to leave.

"Carls, I think I'm just going to go home, and lie down there," I said starting to sit up, and find my shoes at the side of the door.

"What? Sam, no you're sick, you should have someone look after you!" Carly insisted, starting after me.

I shook my head, "I just need to sleep, really Carly, I'll be fine. All I need is sleep."

"How will you get home? You can't take the bus, I _could _drive you, but–"

"–I'll drive her!" Freddie suddenly says.

Carly stares at him as if he's crazy, "_You_? Why would you of all people want to be giving Sam a ride? You guys hate each other."

Freddie hesitated, obviously thinking of an excuse, then he starts to ramble, "Well I have to go . . . to a place, where they sell things I need, and it just happens to be on the way to Sam's. So I could give Sam a ride, so you don't have to kill the earth, and waste gas. Instead _I'll _kill the earth and waste gas, so I can go to the place where they sell the things I need and–" I nudged Freddie, "–I mean, yeah, I'll give her a ride." he finished.

Carly looked at him with a raised eyebrow, "Well, alright. Just don't kill each other." she says.

Don't have to worry, Carly, he's already dead.

I finished putting my shoes on and then walked out the door, Freddie soon following behind me. He grabbed my arm, and pulled me out to the fire escape. Oh God, the fire escape.

I shifted my feet uncomfortably, "So . . . I don't know, speak." I said.

Freddie sighed, "I have no idea what to say."

My eyes widened, "Why did you make me leave, then?" I snapped at him.

"I didn't _make _you leave, you left on your own!" Freddie countered back, with his own fire-y tone.

"Yes, but you _knew _if you told me that, I would catch on – and then leave! So you have to be the one to start the conversation, Fredner–. . ." My voice trailed off, and I found myself chuckling quietly.

"What?" Freddie asked, "What's so funny?"

"Us," I said, "It's like . . . _it_, never really happened."

Suddenly, I remembered a feeling I had only days ago. Quite a few days actually, and I felt . . . vulnerable. Like I wasn't safe. Like Freddie could . . . hurt me.

No, Sam stop it! He's Freddie, he would _never _heart you! I mentally-slapped myself.

Freddie didn't smile, or smirk, or even laugh quietly to himself about what I said. He didn't like what I said. Maybe it reminded him that fact that, he wasn't with us anymore, and he was dead. Was Freddie . . . sad to be dead?

"I might have told you too much yesterday . . . your yesterday," he murmured, "I probably even broke the rules by using the Ouiji board to speak to you."

"Rules? What rules?" I asked.

"See, that's another way I've said too much," Freddie mumbled, "I can't tell you. There are lots of things I can't tell you, because they would put you in harms way. So I'm protecting you, because I can't tell you."

I nodded slowly, looking at him, "I think you saved my life." I stated.

Freddie smiled, "Really, and how did I save your life?"

"You made me promise to go to school, for the first time in months. And when I do, my house gets intruded. If _you _hadn't told me to go to school, I would've been in the house when the burglar came into my house. Who knows what he would've done to me, if I was home." I finally finished, almost out of breath, because I had talked to fast.

Freddie stared at me wide-eyed, then he stared at the ground, like he was deep in thought. He glanced up at me once or twice, but then went back to thinking.

Finally he spoke, "You're smarter than you look, Puckett."

I shrugged, "Eh, whatever. Now tell me . . . _why _is the burglar important?"

Freddie froze, he stared at me, terrified, "That's one of the things I should've of told you," he said, "It might be dangerous for you to know. Which is why, I can't tell you, I can't tell you who the burglar is. It would mess up the time stream–" Freddie's eyes grew wide "–Wait, oh know! I shouldn't of told you that!" he cried.

"Why are you keeping secrets, what's so important that I can't know? If you told me, maybe I could help!" I insisted.

"I can't tell you!" Freddie yelled.

"Why not!" I screamed.

Suddenly, Freddie's face got very dark, terrifying, reminding me of that vulnerable feeling. His eyes got from a sparkling brown to something indescribably scary, his face dropped of any emotion he had later on, and said in a dark voice, that didn't belong to him, "Because you would die."

My eyes widened. What was he talking about, and what was with his face, his eyes, and his voice? He wasn't like a totally different creature. He wasn't himself.

Freddie blinked and then held his head, "I-I'm sorry . . . ." he whispered. He turned around, putting his back to me.

"Freddie," I said, finding my voice quiet, and quivering, "what's wrong with you?"

He turned around, and his face was sad, he looked as if he was about to cry, and the second I thought he would, he said something else:

"**Only you can hear my quiet scream,  
****Because the blade has a incentive scheme,  
****The slayer is more imminent than you think,  
****Just promise me not to blink,  
****This is not a trance,  
****Just give love a chance,  
****Then maybe you'll see,  
****What would be."**

I stared at him, in pure shock, "What. The. _Hell_?" I said.

Freddie didn't answer me, "C'mon, I'll drive you home." was all he said, taking my shoulder and taking me to his mother's car.

We drove home in silence, Freddie didn't want to talk, and I was too terrified to speak, let alone move. Once Freddie dropped me off, I opened the door to the car and stepped out, turned around to say goodbye at the least.

"Sam," he said, "I know you're busy, but can you do one thing. It's important." Freddie said.

I nodded.

"Do the interview, talk about my murder with Officer Ferris for the record. It's important, it'll help."

I was about to ask, "With what?" but I decided against it. He probably wouldn't tell me anyways.

Freddie looked me in the eye, his eyes were still scary, like something was in there, "I love you," he said. Then he drove away.

Life, is officially _fucking _creepy.

* * *

**Authors Note:**

**Hey guys! Missed you! My vacation was AWESOME, and now I'm back, and I hope I'm not leaving ANYMORE. I have a few babysitting jobs here and there, but that's all.**

**Anyways, here's the next chapters, and while I was away, I got a BUNCH of new ideas to make this story (a) last a bit longer, and (b) be even MORE creepy! :D**

**I love this story SO much. :)**

**Love,  
Emma**


	13. Chapter Thirteen: Day 11

**The Quiet Scream  
**_a Seddie fanfiction  
_by Emma

* * *

**Summary: He's there. Then he's not. Am I going insane? Is life torturing me? The only thing I know, is that I'm afraid to admit I might be crazy. Because if I'm crazy. They'll take him away.**

* * *

Chapter Thirteen  
**Day 11**

Once again, I woke up at Carly's. When I scanned my eyes around the room, Carly was sitting directly in front of me, staring at me.

I raised my eyebrow at her, and was about to ask what was with her and the creepy staring mania. But instead she spoke.

"What's going on with you?"

My heart skipped a beat. What was she going on about? Then it hit me, yesterday I was with Freddie, so I wasn't _here _in this world. That means I was "sleeping" all day . . . and Carly must've saw that.

"W-what are you talking about? I decided to play dumb.

"You!" Carly cried, "Yesterday, I tried all day to wake you up, but you _wouldn't_, I even tried waving bacon under your nose, and that wouldn't work! So I called your name, and you just mumbled, 'Freddie, Freddie' under your breath! I thought you were in a coma or something Sam, I was going to call the doctor today if you didn't wake up. So tell me . . . has anything weird been happening to you lately?"

I wanted so badly to tell Carly, but I knew I couldn't. I would sound crazy, and I couldn't go to an insane asylum now. Even though I think I needed one myself. But what if Freddie needed me to do more things for him? That could possibly save someone's life. Even if Freddie _wasn't _real, I wanted to help, because I could possibly help other people.

"Carly . . . I-I can't really say," I mumbled.

"Why not?" Carly yelled, "Sam, I'm worried about you!"

"I know, but I just . . . can't tell you. It's private."

"DAMMIT SAM!" Carly yelled, standing up off the chair, "What's wrong with you? You're lying to me, I'm your best friend! Aren't I? You promised we would still be friends, no matter what happened, and then you finally start being happier, and going to school, and getting over Freddie, and then you start acting all crazy again!"

"I'm not getting over Freddie!" I yelled at Carly, "You think I'm 'getting over' him? Hell no! I'm not even close! If you were really my friend, you would've noticed that!"

That hit Carly hard, she took a step back.

"I'm far from getting over him Carly! I'm just trying to get back on track, my friend died . . . I-I love him, and you expect me to get over him!"

"I love him too, Sam, he was like my brother." Carly said softly.

"No, Carly, no. I _love _him, as in I wanted to kiss him, as in I wanted him to be my boyfriend. And now he can't, because he's DEAD! How do you think I feel, huh? How am I supposed to get over someone, who I love, and I'm _never _going to see again?" That was a lie. But I couldn't tell Carly I was seeing Freddie, I just couldn't.

"Sam, I . . . I didn't know."

"Yeah, you didn't! So why don't you just leave me alone!"

"NO!"

"WHY THE HELL NOT!"

"Because you're my best friend! I want you to be happy, I want you to be safe!"

"Well, what are we doing now Carly? Look where you've trying has gotten us, huh? We're battling over a sleeping problem, because _you _seem to think there's something wrong with me!"

"It's not just a sleeping problem, Sam, I can tell. You might love Freddie, but that's not what's really bothering you. There's something else, I can tell. Why can't you tell me?"

"Because, it's _private_." I said through clenched teeth.

Carly's eyes started to water, "Sam, it can't be that private. I can help, we can do something about it."

"I don't think you can," I said, if she found out, she would immediately call the Asylum and have them take me away. She wouldn't understand that she couldn't do that. That I had to stay, which was the reason I couldn't tell her, so I didn't have to leave.

"Well just try me."

"Carly . . . t-there are some things that people have to keep to themselves, to keep a secret. Can't you respect that?"

"Can't you respect that I'm worried about you?" Carly countered.

"I can, and I am. I'm fine, see? Now respect _me_, and let me keep whatever is going on with me, a secret. If it was completely horrible, I would tell you."

Carly's eyes dropped to the ground, then flashes back up to me, she stood up, and glared, "Would you, Sam? Because I'm not so sure." then she left me alone in the room.

For the rest of the day, Carly didn't speak to me. She didn't so much as look at me. I couldn't tell if she was mad, or sad, or just a mix of both. I was seeing both, but who could really trust what _I _see?

I spent most of my time during the day, lying in Carly's room, I wanted to think everything over, but for some reason, I couldn't. It was like a blank spot in my brain. I remembered Freddie's strange behavior, and my vulnerable feeling, each of which I couldn't exactly explain.

Freddie said something . . . a sort of riddle. Something I couldn't remember all that well, something about a knife . . . or a blade. Trusting in love. All I know is that it was incredibly freaky, and I wasn't sure I wanted to hear it again.

That night I fell asleep, and had a dream.

**Once again, I was running, but suddenly I stopped, panting and out of breath. I knelt down and put my hands on my knees. I could hardly breath, I felt as if I had been running for months, months or years. **

**Suddenly there it was again, the hand, the terrifying grey hand, coming out of darkness to find me, lightening flashed, and Freddie was in front of the hand, that had started to lurch towards me slower, slower . . . .**

**I couldn't speak, I still felt as if I couldn't breath. I stared at Freddie, my eyes wide with fear, I didn't understand. I **_**couldn't **_**understand.**

"**Sam," he said finally, "stop running from me."**

**Finally I was able to speak, "W-what?"**

"**Stop running from me.** **Stop running from me.** **Stop running from me.** **Stop running from me.** **Stop running from me. . ." he continued on, over and over again, and overtop of his voice ringing "Stop running from me." in my head, I heard something else.**

"**Only you can hear my quiet scream,  
****Because the blade has a incentive scheme,  
****The slayer is more imminent than you think,  
****Just promise me not to blink,  
****This is not a trance,  
****Just give love a chance,  
****Then maybe you'll see,  
****What would be."**

"**SAM!" Freddie yelled, at the top of his lungs causing everything around me to shake, "STOP RUNNING FROM ME!"**

**Then he disappeared, and the hand lurched forward.**

* * *

**Authors Note:**

Okaay, so this really only took me a little to write. :) SURPRISINGLY. And be honest, does it suck? I think I might have rushed the beginning a little bit.

But, whatevvsss.

So, has anyone ever heard off www . seddie . wikia . com? Because it's a wiki for Seddie, it's REALLY cool. :) I have an account, can you guess that the user name is? ;)

So I hoped you enjoyed this chapter, and PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE review! Or Freddie might die . . . whoops he already is! ^^


	14. Chapter Fourteen: Day 12

**The Quiet Scream  
**_a Seddie fanfiction  
_by Emma

* * *

**Summary: He's there. Then he's not. Am I going insane? Is life torturing me? The only thing I know, is that I'm afraid to admit I might be crazy. Because if I'm crazy. They'll take him away.**

**

* * *

**

Chapter Fourteen

**Day 12**

I drummed my fingers on the dining table. I had the portable phone in my hand, and Officer Ferris' number in the other. I had to call, Freddie said I _had _to. And though he was incredibly creepy lately, I _had _to listen to him, because I didn't know what was coming at me. Yet he did . . . .

Finally, I sucked up my courage and dialed the number. It seemed as if the phone rang forever. Either that or Ferris just doesn't know how to answer a phone.

Finally I heard his voice over the other end of the phone, _"Hello?"_

"H-hi," I said, "Officer Ferris, it's Sam . . . Sam Puckett."

"Oh yes, Fredward Benson's friend, is this about the break in?" he asked.

"No . . . I-I want a interview, for the record, um, Freddie's record." I explained uneasily.

Ferris sounded quite surprised, "Really? Wow, okay. When?"

"Um, is today too late?" I asked.

"No, no, not at all. Are you sure you want to do this though?"

I sighed, "Yes, I'm sure, I'll meet you at the police station at noon."

"O-okay, sounds good. See you then, bye"

I shut my eyes tight, "Bye." then I hung up the phone.

Dammit Freddie, why do you make me do things I don't want to do? Can't you just tell me what's going to happen, so I can fix it in some way that _I _want to fix it? . . . I guess not. Whatever.

I was still in a pair of Carly's pajamas, from the past two days. So I hadn't taken a shower in that long either. My hair was up in a messy-bed-head bun, so it just looked normal, but I still knew that I had to take a shower. So I did.

Once I was out of the shower, I found an old pair of jeans and a t-shirt from Carly's extra clothes – the ones she hardly ever wears. Once I was done with that I walked downstairs again, where Carly was sitting watching TV.

I walked over behind the couch, and sighed, she hardly even glanced behind her, she was still mad, or sad . . . smad?

"Hey, Carly . . ." I said, "I, uh, I'm going to the police station. To get an interview . . . about Freddie."

I saw Carly twitch, but she didn't turn around, she just said in a very lame or bored voice, "Oh really? Why is that?"

"Because I thought it was about time," I mumbled.

"That's nice."

I groaned, "Carly, what's wrong with you? Why don't you just talk to me?"

"Because, I'm sorta pissed at you right now!" Carly yelled back, "Plus, you're not telling me anything about what's going on with you! You're keeping things from me!"

"Oh, and _you've _never kept anything from _me_ before? What about the plaque at school, you kept that from me for _months_, and if I never came to school that day, you would've _never _told me!"

"I did that to protect you, Sam!" Carly screamed, she had stood up from the couch and was facing me. Her face raging with . . . rage.

"Have you ever thought that maybe _I'm _protecting you from something!" I screamed back at her, Carly had opened her mouth to speak, to talk back, but she had nothing to say, "Yeah, exactly." I said. Then I stormed out of the house.

* * *

I was sitting in a red chofa, – y'know, those huge chairs, that are like a couch, but you _could _fit two people on it if you wanted. – I was waiting for Officer Ferris to come and sit down in the desk in front of me.

The room was in, was quite casual, and there was an old lady with huge rimmed glasses, at a computer in the corner, and on the desk in front of me, there was a tape recorder . . . these things are really ligit aren't they?

I guess you could say I was nervous, I truthfully didn't want to talk about it . . . but now that I was here, and it was happening, I was fine, I was almost _calm._

Then Ferris finally walked into the room, with one more man, in a grey suit, I guess it's like another bystander, or the person who works the recorder.

Suddenly, I started to get nervous – of course _now_! – my palms started to sweat, and clench the sides of the chofa. I told myself that I was going to do this, and that I _could _do this.

"Okay Sam, are you ready?" Ferris asked.

I shook my head, "No," I said, "Just a minute."

Ferris nodded.

I _had _to do this, I didn't know what was happening in the future, this could effect something, this could help with something that was beyond my knowledge. It could possibly save my life again, so I had to do this. C'mon Sam you _have _to do this, okay? Okay?

"Okay," I sighed, "I'm ready."

Ferris nodded once again, then turned to the man in the grey suit, and nodded at him, Grey Suit Man pressed a button on the tape recorder, and nodded back to Ferris.

"State your full name for the record," he said.

I swallowed so hard I thought the tape recorder picked it up, "Samantha Jennette Puckett."

"Okay, Ms. Puckett, I understand you were one of the last people who saw Mr. Fredward Benson alive, correct?"

"Correct," I whimpered.

"Can you tell us what that day was like, and what happened?"

I stared at them, suddenly a deep sense of hatred came over me. These people, as much as they were trying to help, they were trying to ruin. They were going into people's personal lives, just so they can find out what happened to someone. I did _not _want to tell them, not at all.

Once again, I glanced around the room, it was a very large room, but it felt very cramped, like everyone was squishing next to me, staring at me like I was some rare form of a Chinese Giant Panda.

I found myself staring at the door, when I saw something. A glitter of light, forming to a shape, a shape of . . . Freddie. There he was, standing before me. It was slightly translucent, due to the fact that he _wasn't _really there. And he smiled at me, and for the first time in a long time, my heart melted. This was Freddie, this was _my _Freddie. Not the creepy one that had been around me for so long. This was Frednerd. This was Freducinni. This was Benson. This was my Freddie.

_Tell the story Sam, _he seemed to be saying to me, _Tell your story._

The words started to fly out of my mouth, "It was a cold day . . . and wet, but it's usually cold and wet in Seattle. But that day was . . . colder, and wetter. Like something was going to happen. But other than that . . . it was a normal day. I woke up, got ready, and headed over to my best friend – Carly Shay's house. Just like I did everyday.

"We do – did – a webshow, it was very popular called 'iCarly' we would spend every week figuring out what to put on it, and usually it was something completely ridiculous. But that way, the three of us decided to take a break from all the rehearsing and planning we'd been doing for . . . years. And Carly and I rented movies, and got junk food, and Freddie was supposed to come over and watch them with us. . ." my voice trailed off, I knew, and Ferris knew, Grey Suit Man knew, even Creepy Old Lady In The Corner knew, what came next. Next was the worst.

"But he never showed," Ferris whispered.

"But he never showed," I repeated, "We . . . Carly and I, went over to his apartment – he lived right across from Carly in Bushwell Plaza – we knocked on the door. And his mother, Marissa answered. We asked if Freddie was home, and she went . . . berserk – she was a little overprotective – and started flipping out about where Freddie was.

"I . . . truthfully, I was scared, but not on the verge of hysteria. I wasn't going crazy wondering where he was. But I was a little afraid that we . . . we'd n-never find him. . . .

"A-anyways, Marissa said that Freddie went to the Groovy Smoothie before he was supposed to come to Carly's house, so the three of us went down there . . . but no one had seen Freddie for hours. Marissa – by now – has _hit _hysteria . . . about five times," everyone chuckled to themselves, "And . . . we went back to their house, and called the police," tears formed in my eyes, "Freddie was a Missing Person." I looked up at the door once again, he was still there, not egging me on, but there for comfort. I felt as if I could jump up now and run into his arms.

"The night was long . . . and the air went colder, more rigid. Carly seemed to be in some sort of trance, like she was in a coma, but she was awake, and alive and moving. Spencer Shay – Carly's brother – was with us now. Spencer was like, Freddie's older brother, he was just sulking around the apartment, staring out windows. He wasn't cracking a joke, he wasn't smiling or doing anything insane. And this was _Spencer_, Spencer was always acting crazy, but when you looked at him then, he was like . . . this little boy, who was confused about _everything _in the world. Marissa couldn't stop crying, it was a silent cry, because she didn't want anyone to stare or come looking from her. But every few minutes you could hear this . . . painful sob coming from her bedroom."

The whole time, as I said this, I was looking at Freddie, as I continued, I saw tears, real tears slide down his cheeks. I knew he didn't like hearing about his mother's pain, or Spencer's pain, or Carly's pain, or _anyone's _pain. But he _had _to know, because I would be too afraid to tell him the next time I saw him.

"I wandered around Freddie's room. Almost the whole night, just picking up things that I recognized. Like pictures he had around the room, of us, Carly, Spencer, Freddie and I. There were a lot of things like that. I could have been on hysteria there, but . . . I needed to stay calm. For Carly, who was silently freaking out . . . I couldn't, flip out with her. It would've been too much.

"By one o'clock in the morning, Spencer Carly and I went back to Carly's house for the night. I couldn't sleep, could you? I . . . I had to be standing up, and awake. So by two in the morning, I was sitting on this fire escape, that . . . the three of us liked to hang out on," that was a lie, Carly never went on _that _fire escape, "I was just standing by it, looking at the sky. It was about now where I started to think things like, what if he never came back? What if he was lying on the street somewhere dying," this is when I started crying, "What if . . . I never got to tell him, that I loved him?"

The room went silent, I wasn't shocked that I said it. I wanted to say it. It wouldn't feel right if I didn't.

"The next day, to sum it up short for you, we got the call, and Freddie was dead," I swallowed hard again, "My fears had come true, it was the end of the world. . . . That Great Big Sea song is stuck in my head now . . ." I whispered, "Sorry . . . but, it was the end of the world, Marissa lost her son, Carly and I lost a best friend, and Spencer lost a brother, not to mention all the other people who knew Freddie. It's the worst thing anyone could ever go through, the most terrifying thing, and the most silencing. It's like you want to scream, but you can't, because everything around you is so quiet."

Officer Ferris was the first one who spoke next, "What was the last conversation you had with Freddie?"

"Well, it was a day before he . . . y'know disappeared. And we were arguing–"

"Arguing?" Ferris asked, with a bit of concern, and right away I got it.

"Oh no! Not _arguing_, like arguing, like bickering. It was a little thing we did . . . constantly, we pretended to hate each other, but we were _really _good friends. And that day . . . we did our bickering. And we lived our life."

"Was Freddie acting any different than usual?" Ferris asked.

I shook my head, "The day before he disappeared, he was Freddie, and that's all he was. He was no different than he was before. He lived his life to the fullest. He was . . . happy. Just happy."

Officer Ferris nodded and smiled at me, "Okay, thank you Ms. Puckett,"

"I'm done?" I questioned.

Ferris nodded and smiled, "You're done, thank you,"

"You're welcome," I said getting up and leaving the room.

Freddie wasn't near the door when I left, and there wasn't any sight of him as I walked out of the building, or when I started on my way home. There was no sight of him anywhere. Like he disappeared the second I wanted to speak with him again.

_I can talk to him tomorrow,_ I reminded myself. He will be, and I can talk to him then.

There were some things I couldn't believe I put on the record, some private things I haven't told anyone. Like when I was in Freddie's room, that was true, I did spend most of my time in there, sitting on the floor, or pacing around the room.

There was something that stuck with me of what I said though: _It's the worst thing anyone could ever go through, the most terrifying thing, and the most silencing. It's like you want to scream, but you can't, because everything around you is so quiet._ It was true. Everything had turned so silent after Freddie died, like the world hit the pause button. And no one could get used to it.

Then it hit me, like it hit me months ago. I was alone. I felt lonely, I had _no one_.

* * *

**Authors Note:**

**Okaay, here's the next chapter! :) I don't have alot to say about it, other than REVIEW PLEAASE.**


	15. Chapter Fifteen: Day 13

**The Quiet Scream  
**_a Seddie fanfiction  
_by Emma

* * *

**Summary: He's there. Then he's not. Am I going insane? Is life torturing me? The only thing I know, is that I'm afraid to admit I might be crazy. Because if I'm crazy. They'll take him away.**

**

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**

Chapter Fifteen

**Day 13**

Today, I wanted to stay in my room all day, and rot. But I knew I shouldn't, Freddie would be here today, and maybe I could talk to him about how me talking to Officer Ferris helped people in the future. Because now, whenever I think about it, I feel slightly humiliated. And it doesn't help that I know that it's recorded, and typed down on a laptop.

So instead, I took my shower, got dressed, and walked to school. Of course, Freddie was already there, talking to Carly as if nothing had changed. When he saw me, he nodded slightly, then told Carly he had to get to class, and left, bumping into me as he walked away, slipping something into my sweater pocket.

Because I had to act all Sam-Puckett-Before-Heartbreak, I snapped, "Hey, watch it, Fredball."

Freddie, playing along, rolled his eyes, and left.

Carly smiled at me, "You guys seemed to be getting along a few days ago. Anyway, how are you? Are you feeling better?"

I didn't realize how much I miss Carly until _this _Carly started talking to me. I missed me and Carly's talks, and how we used to hang out everyday. It seemed as if the fact that Freddie died ruined everything for us. She seems to think that I need some sort of barrier around me to keep me safe . . . and who knows, maybe I do.

I sighed, "I'm fine, I feel perfectly fine," I told Carly, linking my arm through hers, "Now let's get to class."

"Don't you want to get your books?" Carly asked.

I scoffed, "No way, I'm not here to learn . . . I'm just here to . . . be here, and hang with you, my best friend."

Carly laughed, and we walked to home room together.

I didn't forget about Freddie's note, if that's what you're thinking. I was just a little afraid to open it. Who knows what it says? It could be something I _really _didn't want to know. Or it could be another task he wants me to do, I'm not a big fan of little tasks either.

While I was sitting in class, I took out the piece of paper, and uncurled it in my fingers, sneakily looking down at it, I read what it said: _I want to talk to you about my death, meet me outside the old science room, during home room and we can talk_. _-F _

I sighed, and shot my head up in the air, "Uhm, Ms. Briggs, I-I don't feel to well, could I go lie down in the nurses office for a little bit?"

Ms. Briggs grumbled to herself, "Fine!" she snapped. Looks like _she _went back to being herself.

I nodded and left the room. The old science room is an old science classroom that no one has used since the 50's. If you look in the desk, there's still packages of old cigarettes, and gum, and some candy. Sometimes there were even old note books. The room apparently had a gas leak sometime in the 50's, and the gas people came and fixed it, but no one really went back to use it.

So for _us_, the new generation. It's either the place where you talk to someone alone, or make out central. And now, it's apparently where you can talk to the dead. _Yay_.

As I walked my way through the halls, I found myself worrying. Was Freddie going to be _my _Freddie, or Mr. Creepier-Than-A-Clown Freddie? I missed my Freddie, and I didn't want the creepy Freddie anymore. He seemed to just make everything around me sad. Or _sadder_, I guess?

I reached the old science room and slid myself in through the door, and when I turned around Freddie was already there. Leaning against the old chalkboard, that had a huge crack in the middle. He smiled at me, and it sent a shiver down my back. The thing that scared me the most . . . is that it wasn't a _good _shiver. He had that weird . . . scary look in his eye, that wasn't going away, no matter how many times I blinked.

"Hey," he said breathlessly, "I wanted to talk to you."

I nodded, "Yeah, so what about? I mean . . . your death and all, but why?"

"I just . . . wanted to apologize."

"For what?" I said, "Dying?"

Freddie chuckled, "Not _exactly_, more like the fact that I left you alone. Without telling you how I felt. That's what I want to apologize for."

I felt tears burning in my eyes, but I couldn't cry. Not now.

"It's fine . . . it's not your fault,"I said to him, my voice shaking, "So that was you . . . I wasn't hallucinating?"

"Believe it or not, Sam, none of what your seeing is a 'hallucination.'" Freddie said with a smirk.

I scoffed, but didn't say anything else. Suddenly I found myself anxious, and one question, one question that I wanted to know about. I was afraid to ask him though, I was afraid Freddie would get mad. But I asked it anyway.

"Freddie?"

He looked up at me.

"Did you suffer?"

There was an awkward silence, as if Freddie was deciding whether or not to tell me.

He put his head in his hands and murmured to me, "You're asking me about my death?"

"Well isn't that what you want to talk about?" I snapped at him, getting annoyed.

"Well, I was thinking more about my death through yours eyes–"

"Freddie, I told you _everything_, I felt yesterday! I deserve something!" I yelled at him, "Now, tell me. Did. You. Suffer?"

It took him a long time to answer. Obviously because he didn't want to. Every once in a while he would glance up at me. And finally, as he told me, the creepy in his eyes melted away, and once again, he was Freddie.

"Yes," he whispered, "I did. He made sure of it."

"'He' so you _know _who your murderer is!" I cried.

Freddie nodded, "He made sure of that too, Sam."

"Tell me! Who is it?" I yelled.

Freddie walked forward and put my head between his hands, and moved very close, for a second I thought he was going to kiss me. But he didn't, he had a very stern look in his eye, but he was still Freddie. And his touch calmed me.

"I can't tell you," he whispered.

"Why not?" I whispered back.

"Because, I can't mess with the time stream more than I already have."

"And how have you messed with the time stream?" I asked desperately.

Freddie let go of my face, "Your house was broken into, if I hadn't told you to go school, you would be dead right now," he said, "The reason I told you, to talk to Officer Ferris, is that if you didn't, you would have became a suspect in my murder."

"They thought that . . ." I started, unable to finish.

"They thought that you killed me, and Sam, you went to jail. That's what I saw. So I had to change that too, and I did."

Tears started flowing down my cheeks, and Freddie took my hands. Before I knew it, I was sobbing uncontrollably.

"F-Freddie!" I sobbed, "I-I'm do-one! I c-can't do thi-is anymore!"

Freddie brought me into his arms, and I felt as if a barrier was closed around me, and for a moment in my life I felt safe. Safe in his arms.

"Just-t ple-ease, make i-it s-stop! You h-have all t-the stra-ange god-like pow-wers! Make it stop!"

"I would if I could Sam," Freddie whispered into my ear, "I would if I could."

I stayed like that for awhile, finally when I calmed down, he took my face in his hands again, and forced me to look at him. He was really serious about something.

"Sam, listen to me, and listen closely, okay?" he said.

I nodded.

"Tomorrow, do _not _go to school, stay hidden in Carly's apartment, no one can see you. By 12:15 – exactly 12:15 – you _have _to be in the living room, do _not _go down before that, no matter what you hear, okay?"

This terrified me more, but I nodded anyways, who knows who's like I could be saving now?

"Thank you," Freddie whispered, then suddenly, out of nowhere. He kissed me.

I wasn't expecting it, but that didn't mean I didn't love it. I melted into his touch. His lips felt strangely warm, for someone who was dead. It didn't matter, but before I could get into it anymore, he parted from me. Smiled, and kissing my forehead he left.

* * *

**'Ello, 'ello, 'ello!**

**I've been too lazy to write anything, but suddenly I had an urge to write this, when I remembered how close we were getting to . . . er, something. :)**

**Okay, so "GEE I WONDER WHAT FREDDIE'S WARNING SAM ABOUT?" Even though _I _know. And, yes, it will happen in the next chapter. And _yes _someone gets hurt. And I'm going to let you guess in the review. It's one of these four people**

**-Carly  
-Sam  
-Gibby  
****-Spencer**

**Now choose one. :) AND REVIEW. We're getting close to 200 guys! C'MON LET'S MAKE 200! :D**

**oh  
****btw**

**If you reivew, you're "totally awesome"**

**(Hope you got my A Very Potter Musical reference. :D) **


	16. Chapter Sixteen: Day 14

**The Quiet Scream  
**_a Seddie fanfiction  
_by Emma

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**Summary: He's there. Then he's not. Am I going insane? Is life torturing me? The only thing I know, is that I'm afraid to admit I might be crazy. Because if I'm crazy. They'll take him away.**

**

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**

Chapter Sixteen

**Day 14**

**I was back in the dream world, and I was no longer running, I had stopped, and was lying on the floor, catching my breath. There was no sign of the terrible monster, or Freddie.**

**I was so paranoid that I kept looking in every direction searching for the monster. I was also afraid of seeing Freddie, because he scared me in here too. Like **_**he **_**was the one after me, I wanted to run from him.**

**Suddenly out of nowhere, the hand came down from the sky, wrapping it's disgusting fingers around my body, only exposing my head. **

**I felt the pain, like my whole body was snapping into two, and I let out a terrifying screech.**

"**Sam, Sam," the monster spoke, "Not everything is as it seems."**

**Then it's head came into view, it was covered by a giant hood, and the second before he took it off, I jumped awake.**

"God, Sam," Carly scoffed, holding her head, "No need to brutally assault me."

I noticed my forehead was hurting as well, when I jumped awake I must've bumped Carly's head.

"Sorry, um, nightmare."

"Whatever," Carly whispered, "Are you coming to school, because if not I need to let Spencer know."

"_Stay hidden in Carly's apartment until noon, no one can see you." _

That even meant Spencer . . . .

"Um, yeah, I'm coming." I murmured standing up.

"Fine," snapped Carly, "C'mon then."

I guess Carly was still angry with me.

It was about seven o'clock when Carly woke me up. So I quickly jumped through the shower, got dressed in some of Carly's old clothes, and grabbed a granola bar and headed out the door with Carly.

Now I just had to figure out how to get back into Carly's house without anyone seeing me. I had to lie to Carly, and I couldn't tell her that I decided to stay home, because she would either flip out on me, call Spencer and tell him I was staying home, or both. I would probably do both. So I decided I "forgot" something.

"Um, Carly, I forgot my . . . lunch back at the house, so I'll meet you at school, okay?"

"Whatever," Carly said, walking ahead of me.

I rolled my eyes, she would have to get over it soon, wouldn't she? She _couldn't _be mad at me forever, could she? No, she couldn't. It's not in Carly's nature.

I walked back to Carly's and slowly slid open the door, Spencer must've still been sleeping, because he wasn't in the living room, or the kitchen, and he hardly ever goes to the upstairs, anymore. So I slowly and quietly sneaked up the stairs and back into Carly's bedroom.

It was boring in Carly's room, because she _had _a TV, but I couldn't turn it on, because then Spencer would hear and come and look for me. I looked through her piles of books, but it was just gross books like _Twilight _and other gross-girly-Carly things like that.

I _did not _want to go back to sleep, because I _did not _want to find out how my dream ended. I would rather not like to see myself getting squashed into a teeny-tiny-Sam-Pulp. And who would _want _to see that monsters face? Not me.

So I ended up just lying on Carly's bed, staring up at the ceiling for who knows how long. I was completely bored out of my mind. . . . And I was hungry. _Crap_.

I sit up and glance around Carly's room once again. Books, TV, more books, clothes, makeup, laptop. . . . Laptop? Could I go on the computer for a couple hours? What for? What do I need a computer for.

Suddenly, something flashes through my brain, the thing I want to search up.

"**Only you can hear my quiet scream,**

**Because the blade has a incentive scheme,**

**The slayer is more imminent than you think,**

**Just promise me not to blink,**

**This is not a trance,**

**Just give love a chance,**

**Then maybe you'll see,**

**What would be."**

Freddie's rhyme. I had no idea what it meant, but maybe with a little help from Mr. Google, I _would_. Maybe it would help me understand more about what was going on, maybe I _could _help Freddie.

Quietly I stood up and grabbed the laptop and sat back down on the bed. I pressed the "on" button and waited for it to start up. Once it did, I opened up Google, and started to think.

**Only you can hear my quiet scream. **I already know what "a quiet scream" was, it was when everything is so quiet you can't handle it, but you can't. Maybe Freddie feels that way too, like he wants to scream, but everything around him is on a pause button. After all, he is dead, time can't pass that quickly, can it? But it says only _I _can hear it. Which brings another question, why me? Why out of everything that is happening, can _I _hear it?

I grab a pen and a piece of paper, from Carly's bedside table, and write down the first verse of Freddie's rhyme, beside that I wrote, _"Freddie is struggling, only I can help him."_

Okay, the next verse: **Because the blade has a incentive scheme**. What is "the blade"? That's the first thing I needed to find out. I turn my attention to Google and type in: synonyms for blade, and wait for the results. There are a bunch of websites, but I click on the first one I see. Scrolling down to the very bottom, it says that "blade" can be a synonym for "he", but is rarely ever used. So "blade" means "he", so if we change up the verse a little it now says: **Because ****he**** has a incentive scheme**.

I already knew that "scheme" meant plot, but I wasn't quite 100% sure what "incentive" meant, so once again, I typed that into Google. Once again, I clicked on the first website that came up. It said that "incentive" means "A positive motivational influence". What didn't help is that I had really no clue what _that _meant. And if I put that information together the verse said: **Because ****he**** has a ****positive****, ****motivational****influence****. **Which made really no sense. Who ever was doing this to Freddie, his influence definitely wasn't "positive" at all. He was torturing her.

Something clicked together in my mind then. . . . Maybe, that line was coming from the voice of . . . who ever is "the blade", so it was positive to him, but not to anyone around him. I grabbed the pen and wrote down the verse, then beside it I wrote: _Blade = he = person who is hurting Freddie. Incentive scheme = 'positive evil plan' that isn't positive at all."_

The third verse, and really the last one that I couldn't figure out: **The slayer is more imminent than you think**. Slayer, obviously, means "killer". And killer meant – my eyes widened – Freddie's murderer. Freddie was talking about his _murderer _in this line, so in the second line he must be talking about somebody else. And he is _also_ a "he", that "he" is the "blade"! (I'd just like to point out, that I'm as surprised as you are, about the fact that I'm figuring all this out.) The next thing I needed to find out, was what "imminent" meant, so back to Google I went! Click on the first one . . . _"Full of danger; threatening; menacing; perilous". _My heart seemed to thud to a stop for a moment. Freddie's "slayer", his _murderer_ is more dangerous than I _think _he is? So the man I think, is a life threatening, person ruining, man with _no _soul, is _worse _than I'm thinking he is! Oh _joy_.

I shut Carly's laptop, I'm done researching now. My heart was thudding, my palms were sweating, this was _not_ fun! The walls of my life seemed to be pushing in ever so closely to me now, making fun of me like: "Haha! We're gonna squish you to a pulp!"

I looked at Carly's clock: 11:32. That made my heart thud even faster. What ever was going to happen next, was going to happen in exactly 28 minutes, and I had no idea what it was. Or if it was going to happen at school, or maybe here . . . oh my god. What if it happened here? What would happen to me, what would happen to . . . to Spencer! He was the only one downstairs, and he thought I was at school with Carly! He could get hurt!

The next 28 minutes, seemed like five lifetimes to me. My heart was pounding harder than ever, and I was finding it hard to control my breathing, to make it equal.

Suddenly the door slammed shut, making me jump on the bed. I glanced at the clock, 11:59, then a second later 12:00.

"_By 12:15 – exactly 12:15 – you have to be in the living room, do not go down before that, no matter what you hear, okay?"_

I silently got up from the bed, and grabbed one of Carly's wristwatches and slapped it onto my wrist, then I snuck out of Carly's bedroom. I had to hear what was going on there, and this way I could. I was ready to listen.

I heard Spencer humming to himself downstairs, and suddenly, it stopped abruptly, "Oh, hello. When did you, uh, come into my house?" he asked in a confused voice.

"I just came in," replied another male voice. He seemed calm . . . too calm.

There was an awkward silence before Spencer began to speak again, "You realize that's kinda . . . illegal."

"I'm not one who cares about 'the law' Spencer Shay."

"H-how do you know my name?" Spencer stammered, "Who _are _you?"

"Can it, Shay," the male voice responded, his voice was stern, very stern.

Something dropped, sounded like metal, Spencer seemed to be mumbling something, like he was afraid. It was quiet, and the more quiet it got, the more anxious and afraid _I _got.

"W-what are you doing?" Spencer asked, his voice shaking with fear, "Who _are _you!"

"My name is Leroy Hamilton," Leroy said, "You don't know me."

"Then why are you here?" Spencer asked.

"That's easy, to kill you."

Everything was still, everything was silent. It wasn't like those weird movies, when everything is silent, except for that strange cricket in the background. It was dead silence.

"What have I-I ever done to you?" Spencer asked, his voice cracking, it sounded like he was on the verge of tears.

"Nothing, except for living, except for iCarly. You've taken in Samantha Puckett, haven't you? She was supposed to be _dead _by now, but you and your little sister have tricked her into coming to school! She should be dead, since I missed her the first time, you're next on my list. Say goodbye to the world, Spencer Shay."

"NO!" Spencer yelled, "List, what list!"

"_My _list, _the _list," Leroy answered, "First was Benson, second was Puckett, and last were the two Shay's."

_First was Benson_? No way, oh my god. No way. This was Freddie's murderer! He said _I _should be dead by now that only means . . . could _he _be the one who broke into my house?

"You . . ." Spencer said in such a small whisper I could scarcely hear it, "_You _killed Freddie!" he screamed at the top of his lungs.

"Ah, ah, ah," Leroy murmured, as I heard a small click, "One more step, and I'll blow your head off."

Spencer obviously stayed silent and still.

"Now, is anyone else in this apartment? And I want the truth, or I'll make sure you don't live."

"No, no!" Spencer cried, "I swear on _my life_ that no one else is in this apartment!" Spencer said. He was obviously scared, and truthfully, I, myself, have never been so scared in my whole entire life.

"Fine, I believe you," Leroy said, with a strange hint of glee in his voice, "Firstly, my name is Leroy Hamilton, I am 37 years old, and my duty here is to kill you. Any last words, Spencer Shay?"

"You are a bastard." Spencer said bitterly.

Leroy laughed, "Fair enough."

There was a loud bang, and Spencer loud out a terrifying scream, and I had to bite hard into my hand to keep me from screaming. Then, there was silence, footsteps, and the door slammed shut.

I shakily stood up, but remembered I could only go down at 12:15. I checked my watch, it only read 12:13, I had to wait two more minutes, it was probably to make sure that Leroy had left. Two minutes was worse than 28, Spencer was down there _bleeding_ to death!

Finally the clock turned 12:15, and I ran down the stairs. The sight was worse than I expected, Spencer was lying on the ground, his eyes large and watery in fear. The bullet had gone straight through his chest, and there was a pool of blood around him.

I dropped down to his sides and grabbed his hands, he was awake, and he glanced over at me. His face ridden with confusion, but utter happiness that I was here.

"I-it's okay, Spencer," I told him, tears running down my cheeks, "I'm here, and I'm going to help you."

He tried to speak, but I didn't let him, I called 911, and told them where we were, they were rushing here as I sat down next to Spencer.

Spencer let out a wheezy breath, and sputtered as blood ran down the corner of his mouth, "S-Sam . . ." he said desperately.

"Shh, don't talk." I told him.

The paramedics arrived then, and loaded Spencer onto a Gurney, and I was holding onto his hand tightly, following the paramedics.

"Sam!" he wheezed, "Sam, I-I saw . . . F-Freddie. . . . I saw Freddie."

My hand dropped, and I stopped in my tracks. Freddie?

* * *

**Authors Note:**

**I can't say much, because I'm getting kicked off the computer. But whoever guessed Spencer was the one who got hurt, YOU WIN.**

**PLEASE review, we're soo close to 200! :D**

**Emma**


	17. Chapter Seventeen: Day 15

**The Quiet Scream  
**_A Seddie fanfiction  
_By Emma

* * *

Chapter Seventeen  
**Day 15**

Do you ever have that feeling, where everything around you is going fast, and you're just slowly trudging behind everyone in slow motion? Well, I was having that feeling now. Freddie's murderer shoots Spencer and then he tells me he _saw _Freddie. How is that possible?

The doctors told me that it was a miracle I was there when I was, because if Spencer had been left there, for another ten minutes, he would've bled out. (A.K.A.: He would've died.)

Which brought me to another thing, how close to death _was _Spencer? Is that how he saw Freddie? He was so close to death, that he saw Freddie. And if Freddie was there, why didn't he show himself to _me_? Aren't I the one who can see him?

So many questions, so little time. Or a lot of time … I'm not exactly sure how much "time" I have. Or if I even _have _time and … now I'm just rambling.

Suddenly Carly ran into the room, tears running from her eyes. When she saw me, she ran towards me, and gave me a huge hug, as she started to sob.

"Sam, I-I'm so sorry! I-I was just angry, and I was letting my feelings get in the way of our friendship!" she cried, "Thank you! Thank you for skipping school, you saved him! You saved Spencer! How did you know when to go down?"

I shrugged, "I'm not sure …" I lied, "I just … went down after it sounded like, the guy left."

Carly hugged me tighter, "Thank you, thank you! I'm sorry, I'm _so _sorry!"

I hugged her back. I had really missed Carly; I always hated it when she was mad at me. Now that she was back, I was ecstatic to have her back in my life. She was my best friend; after all, who else could I trust?

"It's fine, Carly really, you don't have to worry. We have to worry about, Spencer," I told her, holding her shoulders, as she faced me.

Carly sniffed, "O-of course. What's happening, is he okay?"

"The last I heard is that he was still in surgery, and they were fixing all the leaks of his blood... There was a lot of blood."

Carly bit her lip, and blinked hard, nodding at me, "Is he going to be okay?"

"They say he should be. But it's probably going to be a hard recovery."

"Oh Sam!" Carly cried, bursting out into tears, and falling into my arms.

"Shh … Carls, it's okay. It's going to be fine," I promised her, though I wasn't really so sure myself.

Too many things were going on to be able to be sure of _anything _right now. I know I've said that _thousands _of times, but this time I _really _meant it. This was all happening for some sick twisted reason. And it was all happening to _me_. Why _me_? Dammit … seriously! Why _ME_?

Carly and I sat nervously for two more hours, as the doctors finished up on Spencer. Then one came out and told us everything, they were able to stop the bleeding, and patch him up. They needed to keep him here in the hospital for a week, for observation, in case the bleeding acted up again.

We went in to sit with Spencer after that, his face wasn't horrible, and there were a few starches here and there, but nothing too serious. There was a giant bandage near his chest though, where the bullet had hit him. Carly sat beside him, on a chair, clinging tightly to his hand, as I sat across the room, curled up in a ball, leaning against the palm of my hand. We were going to be here all night, I could tell.

Just then, there was a quiet rap on the door, and I turned my head to look over. It was Officer Ferris; he sighed apologetically at Carly and I, and sat down beside me.

"You need my interview right?" I sighed, sitting up.

Ferris nodded, "Do you want to do it here, or in a more … private place?"

"No, no, I can do it here. This way Carly can hear the story too," I said, placing my hands in my lap.

"Okay … so, start. How did this all happen?" he asked, nudging his head towards poor, unconscious Spencer.

"Well … I _was _going to school, but I went home because-"

"Because you forgot something," Carly said, then she blushed, "Oh … sorry."

I smirked, "Yeah, I forgot my textbook," I lied, "But when I got there, I started feeling light-headed, and just sick. So I went upstairs to Carly's and lied down, and I fell asleep. Then I woke up to Spencer's voice. And there was another one – obviously the shooter. I couldn't hear much, but I heard the guy say his name was Leroy Hamilton and that-"

"Woah, back up," Ferris interrupted me, "Did you say _Leroy Hamilton_ was the other voice?"

I nodded, "Yeah … a-and he said he was the one who … killed Freddie."

Carly gasped, and brought her hand to her mouth, the obvious pose for someone who is "utterly shocked".

Ferris nodded silently, as he wrote something down on his piece of paper, "You're _certain _he said his name was Leroy Hamilton?"

I cocked my eyebrow, "Yeah. One hundred-percent. Why?"

"Oh, no reason," Ferris said quickly, "So continue, what happened next?"

"Well … as I said … he said he was the one who … killed Freddie," I restated, "And then … he said something about killing off iCarly, and saying _he _was the one who broke into my house, because he thought I would be home and he … wanted to kill … me."

I heard Carly let out a small sob.

"He asked if anyone was home – I didn't tell Spencer I was home … he was asleep when I got there. So Spencer said no … and then … he shot him. And left. That's it."

Officer Ferris sighed, "Okay … thank you Sam, you've been a big help lately with us. Oh, another reason I came here was to tell you that you're able to get back into your house."

In spite of the situation, I smiled, "Really?"

"Yeah, here's your key back."

I took my key and hung onto it for dear life. My clothes! My things! My room! I missed it all so much!

Officer Ferris said goodbye to Carly and I, and frowned sadly at Spencer as he left, who was still asleep and unconscious.

"Hey Carls," I started, "I'm going to my house. I haven't been there in _forever_. But do you want me to drop by your house on the way back, and bring you some pyjamas and a change of clothes?"

"You would do that?" Carly sniffed, "Even after how I've treated you?"

I smiled at nodded, "Of course. You're still my best friend. I love you."

Carly hugged my tightly, "I love you too."

I hugged her back, and then left.

I took the bus back to my house, and when I opened the door, I was _so _happy to be back. It seemed everything was still there, and it was clean … shockingly. My house wasn't exactly in the best condition when I left. My mother usually just dropped her dirty clothes anywhere … same with food, and once in a while she dropped a twenty dollar bill on the floor, so I'd pick that up.

To be totally honest, I wasn't exactly sure where my mother _was _right now. I left a message on her cell phone, telling her that our house had been broken into, and she couldn't go back into it. She texted me back saying, "okay" and that was the last I heard from her. I'm sure she went to stay with one of her slutty friends or something, and she should be back once I tell her you were able to go into the house.

As I walked around the house – covered in it's strange cleanliness – I couldn't help but think about Spencer, and his condition, and what happened. Spencer was the one I had to save … and I saved him. But will he be back to _normal_? And what exactly _is _normal? Did he _really _see Freddie? He must have … why else would be have told me that? There were so many questions to be answered … none of which I could answer myself, and I bet if I asked Freddie, he would tell me something lame like, "It's a secret, sorry! Boys only!" (Okay, so I'm kidding about the "boys only" part. But you get the idea.)

Speaking of Freddie … what was _he _trying to do? Obviously, he was asking me to save the people we care about, but what was he planning to do with the situation I'm in? I'm seeing him, and he's dead. I haven't seen him _trying _to stop this. I was being serious when I said I was _done_. I _really _am, I'm done. I don't want to see him anymore; I want him to … be dead! Though … I _do _want him to be here … to be alive, and to be with me. But that's not possible; I know it's not possible.

I stopped in every room, my room, and my mother's room, –which actually _didn't _get cleaned, because of all the crap that's in there – the two bathrooms, the kitchen, the living room. Though I thought I was forgetting a room, yet I _knew _I wasn't. My house wasn't a very big house, and those were _all _the rooms that were in here.

_The backyard, _I heard a voice, _go to the backyard, Sam. _I recognized this voice … this was Freddie's voice. So to the backyard I went.

A strange eerie feeling came for over me, as I waked out into my backyard, everything _seemed _the same everything _looked _the same. But something was out of place. Something was here … that didn't belong.

_Crunch, _I heard a sound from under my foot.

I took a deep breath, and lifted my foot, gazing down at whatever was under me. Once I saw it, I stumbled back.

It was my photograph.

_Except for one thing. A picture I had on my wall. It was a picture of Carly, Spencer, Freddie and I about a year ago. We were all smiling, with our arms around each other. It was gone. My picture was gone._

_"Well . . . one thing was stolen. It was a picture of my friends and I. Carly and Spencer Shay, and Freddie, it was the only thing that was gone."_

My picture. It was there. Only one thing was different about it. Freddie's face had an "X" through it; Spencer's face had an "X" through it. My face was circled.

* * *

**Authors Note**

Oooohhh maaan.

Okay, so, sorry I didn't update for a ... little longer than I usually do. I was at friend's cottage for two days, and I just got back today. I _would've _finished it the day before I left, but my sister wanted on the computer, and blah, blah, blaaah. So yeah, at least you have it now.

I think ... if I'm thinking _correctly_, this story has ... maybe five more chapters left. (And that's including an epilogue.) But I don't know ... it could have six, or seven. But probably not past eight. So ... now I feel sort of sad ... because this story is coming to a close.

Well ... tell me how much you're gonna MISS this story, in your review. ;) We're ALMOST at 200! Currently we have 182. So, we need 18 more! AND, let's say ... the 200th review ... gets the next chapter dedicated to them. How 'bout that? So ... review ... pleeeeeaaase. :)

Emma


	18. Chapter Eightteen: Day 16

1**The Quiet Screa  
**_A Seddie fanfiction  
_By Emma

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_**Author's Note: I don't usually do these kinds of things … but whatever.**_

_**I wish to dedicate this chapter to one of my favourite authors here on fanfiction: SimonandJeanetteAreBest, mostly because ALL of her Seddie stories are absolutely amazing, but also because whenever she reviews, I know it comes from the heart, not just a simple, "Update soon!" Another reason … she dedicated a whole STORY to ME! (And another author) So far there's only two chapters, but I'm already hooked! It's called "Sammy Get Your Gun" and I can't really explain the plot … other than it's already an "epic win'! Here's the link!: **www . fanfiction . net /s/6241448/1/ Sammy_Get_Your_Gun_

_

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_

Chapter Eighteen  
**Day 16**

I woke up the next day, lying on my couch, with the door ringing. Yesterday, from what I can remember, I fell asleep on the couch … confused; I got up from the couch and walked over to the front door, opening it, to the face of Officer Ferris.

"O-Officer Ferris?" I questioned. What was he doing here? Wasn't today the day Freddie was supposed to come?

Ferris raised an eyebrow at me, "Did I come too early? I told you I would come at noon."

Finally it clicked in … last night after I found the … picture, I had called Officer Ferris, and told him to come first thing in the morning – then I realized that first thing would be like eight, and I told him noon.

"Oh, yes, of course. Come on in."

I stepped out of the way to let him past me, and smiled meekly. Then I realized I was still in my pyjamas … and they had purple pigs on them. Oh great.

"So … you found your missing picture frame?" Officer Ferris nodded, "The one that was supposedly stolen?"

I nodded, "Yes, and … it had something on it."

"What kind of something?" Ferris asked with a smirk, "I need a little more information."

"Well," I sighed, "I didn't want to touch it, so I got a Tupperware dish and put it overtop, so hopefully, it's still there."

"Okay, show me."

I brought Officer Ferris out to my backyard, and showed him where I left the picture, which was still in the exact same place, he lifted up the Tupperware container, and saw the picture. I heard him mumble, "Poor girl," as he pulled on a glove, and placed the picture frame in a plastic bag that read: evidence.

"E-evidence?" I nearly squawked, "What is it evidence for?"

"For Freddie's case of course," Ferris said, "Sam, whoever left this on your front lawn, obviously is Freddie's murderer, and Spencer's shooter – Leroy Hamilton."

"Who is Leroy Hamilton anyways?" I asked desperately.

"He's a wanted man, Sam," Ferris explained, "Leroy Hamilton has been arrested three times before for possession of drugs, shoplifting, and other small crimes. And now, he's a murderer, he's incredibly dangerous."

I sucked in a small breath. Whoever Leroy was, he was after me.

"I don't mean to scare you, but this is serious. If he's after you … we need to get you safe. You shouldn't be left alone. Are you able to stay with Carly Shay?"

I sighed, I had just gotten home, and already I was leaving. But I nodded, and told Ferris that if I went to pack a few clothes, he could drop me off there today.

I packed a couple pairs of pants, and a handful of shirts. I could borrow sweaters from Carly, and possibly some extra pyjamas. I also took about my whole underwear drawer. Then I walked down the stairs with my bag over my shoulder.

Ferris dropped me off at Carly's, and told me not to be alone, or go outside without someone with me. Two is better than one, and I should be safe, and if I was worried about anything, to call him immediately.

Carly was home surprisingly, I would've thought she'd be at the hospital with Spencer. But she said she came back to get a few of Spencer's things.

"He woke up finally," Carly said happily, "And he wanted his sculpturing magazine, and his favourite sweater. What are you doing here though?"

Quickly I told her all about what I found in my backyard, and how I shouldn't be alone. I could tell that Carly was starting to freak out more and more, as I told her more and more. When I was finished, she was clinging to my arm.

"Sam! This is … horrible! I can't believe this is happening to us! Why us?" she cried.

"I don't know Carly …" I whispered, "But … there's something else."

"Something else! What else could there be?"

"Remember the first time I came to school … and I told you that I saw Freddie?" I said slowly.

Carly thought for a moment, but then nodded, "Yeah, sort of."

"Well … I'm still seeing him."

Carly was silent for a few minutes, she looked at me as if I was crazy. I bet to her I sounded crazy, but I now knew I wasn't crazy.

"Sam … you're sick. Let me call the hospital-"

"Carly no!" I cried, grabbing onto her arms, "No you have to believe me, after all, what are best friends for?"

Carly sighed, and continued to stare at me, eventually she just nodded, and told me to explain.

"Okay. Well, it's true. I'm seeing Freddie, and I know I sound crazy, but I'm not! Freddie knows this is happening, and whenever I see him, we're in a alternate dimension, and you're there, and Spencer's there, and everybody we know is there, but Freddie never died. And I see him, every two days. The days when I'm asleep, and you can't wake me up. They're not dreams, I know they're not dreams, because they're too clear, too vivid. Now, the real reason I was able to save Spencer, is not because I was insanely lucky, it's because Freddie told me, he told me to stay home, and because Freddie told me that, I was able to save Spencer."

It was quiet, as Carly seemed to take in everything I told her. She didn't say anything; she didn't look me in the eye. She just stared at the floor, analyzing everything.

"Carly?" I whispered, "Please, you have to believe me."

Carly nodded, "I-I do. I can't believe it, but I do. I believe you, Sam."

I loud out a puff of breath as relief. She believed me, now I wasn't the only one sharing this secret. Carly knew and maybe she could help me.

Carly called Spencer and told him she would come back with his things tomorrow morning, because I was here, and we were going to spend the night together. Spencer reluctantly agreed, and said goodbye to both of us.

Carly and I did spend the rest of the night with each other much, though we didn't talk to each other. We just watched movies, and ate meat, popcorn, and Peppy Cola. We only spoke when need be. I could tell that Carly was still taking everything that I told her; it's not easy when your best friend tells you she's been seeing your dead friend. Every so often I caught her staring at me, but when I turned my head to look back at her, she turned her head back to the television, like a boy staring at his crush.

At about quarter past ten, the phone rang, Carly picked it up, saying that it was probably Spencer calling to complain that he was bored. But when I saw Carly's expression change as whoever was on the phone spoke to her, I knew it wasn't Spencer. She hung up the phone shakily and stared at me.

"Sam … that was Officer Ferris. They found him, they found Leroy Hamilton."

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**Authors Note**

Sorry it's short, I guess it's more of a filler. But I hoped you liked it anyways.

I have something I want you guys to do for me, please ask me a question, any question at the end of your review, I'm going to be writing a blog post on my blog (which I mean to use more!) and I'll answer them there.

www . wearenerdshearusroar . wordpress . com (that's my blog)

Okay ... so the 200th review is one of thost anonymous reviewers ... so I guess it doesn't really count, but whoever **-fan** is. The next chapter is going to be for you. :) Okay? YAYZ! :D cheers, claps, yadda, yadda, yadda and all that jazz. :)

Emma


	19. Chapter Nineteen: The Trail

**The Quiet Scream  
**_A Seddie fanfictio  
_By Emma

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**Okay. So since the 200th reviewer was anonymous, I changed my mind. This chapter, is for everyone, anyone who took the time to stick with me, and read my story that I thought up randomly one day … this is for you, for my reviewers, for my story alert people who never review (:P) for everyone. Thank you. This was my first iCarly story to make it past 200 reviews, and it's absolutely epic that it did. Everyone is just so nice, and so yeah, this chapter is for everyone**

**

* * *

**

_Chapter Nineteen  
__**The Trial**_

Officer Ferris wasn't lying. They did find him. They found Leroy Hamilton. He was lying in a prison cell right now awaiting his trial. He was arrested a month ago. A month ago was the day Freddie was supposed to show up, but he didn't show. Neither did he show the day after that, or the day after that, or the day after that.

I cast myself into a pit of depression once again, but this time it was worse. I missed him more than ever, his touch, his presence, the feel of his lips against mine. I missed it. He didn't contact me in dreams, and the Ouiji board didn't work. It was like he was ignoring me, and I felt alone, like he wasn't even with me anymore. Even though he said he would be, all day, everyday.

I've been back in my house for two weeks; Officer Ferris said I was safe now, that didn't really help with the depression and the loneliness. Though ironic enough, I want to be alone, but then I'm lonely when I'm alone. It's a vicious circle.

Leroy Hamilton's trail was tomorrow. And once again, Carly was making me go. Since I had basically shut myself up in my house, and she thought it was a good idea that, "I saw Freddie's justice". To say the truth, I want to go to the trial, but I'm afraid to. I'm afraid of what will happen, and afraid of what Leroy Hamilton will do or say.

That night I fall asleep, and dream for the first time in weeks.

**Everything was dark around me, and I could hardly even see my hand in front of my face, but then lights turned on everywhere around me, and I was in a large white room. There wasn't a place to sit anywhere, and the room seemed to stretch out until forever. So I started walking, trying to find a way out of it.**

** As I walked, the white around me moulded into a grey, and then a darker grey, and the grey kept on getting darker until the white had turned into black, and I finally recognized where I was. I was in that black void where all my previous dreams were … all my nightmares. Yet I forgot what was in my nightmares that I was so afraid of.**

**Then everything started to shake around me, and I heard thumps, loud ones, one after the other, like giant footsteps after me, and I got scared.** **I was running. Running in darkness, the only thing I could see was myself. I was crying, and screaming, only I couldn't hear what I was screaming. It was like I was deaf.**

** There was something after me, I wasn't quite sure what it was, but out of the darkness came a giant grey hand, the fingernails grimy, and dirty, filled with mud, dirt, sticks, and the most grotesque of all … human body parts.**

** Just as the monster was about to come out of the shadows, I screamed, – this time I heard it. Loud and clear, an ear piercing shriek, a sound that could break anything; a window, a mirror, a wine glass, your eardrum. **

** I was running, but suddenly I stopped, panting and out of breath. I knelt down and put my hands on my knees. I could hardly breath, I felt as if I had been running for months, months or years. **

** Suddenly there it was again, the hand, the terrifying grey hand, coming out of darkness to find me, lightening flashed, and Freddie was in front of the hand, that had started to lurch towards me slower, slower…. **

** I couldn't speak, I still felt as if I couldn't breath. I stared at Freddie, my eyes wide with fear, I didn't understand. I **_**couldn't **_**understand.**

** "Sam," he said finally, "stop running from me."**

** Finally I was able to speak, "W-what?"**

** "Stop running from me.** **Stop running from me.** **Stop running from me.** **Stop running from me.** **Stop running from me…" he continued on, over and over again, and overtop of his voice ringing "Stop running from me." in my head.**

** "SAM!" Freddie yelled, at the top of his lungs causing everything around me to shake, "STOP RUNNING FROM ME!"**

**I was no longer running, I had stopped, and was lying on the floor, catching my breath. There was no sign of the terrible monster, or Freddie.**

**I was so paranoid that I kept looking in every direction searching for the monster. I was also afraid of seeing Freddie, because he scared me in here too. Like **_**he **_**was the one after me, I wanted to run from him.**

** Suddenly out of nowhere, the hand came down from the sky, wrapping its disgusting fingers around my body, only exposing my head. **

** I felt the pain, like my whole body was snapping into two, and I let out a terrifying screech.**

** "Sam, Sam," the monster spoke, "Not everything is as it seems." **

** The monster came into view. It's body the horrible grey, and as I looked at its face I screamed. It was Freddie. Freddie's face was on the monster. Freddie was the monster?**

_I_ jumped up in my bed, panting, sweating. That dream … that nightmare, it was about five in one. So my dreams … nightmares, were trying to tell me something all along? That Freddie was the monster? That I shouldn't be with him?

I realized that I had slept through the night, and that today was the day of the trial. I glanced at the clock, it was 6:30 am, and the trial was at 10. I had time to get ready. (By ready I didn't mean shower, get dressed, put the pretty-pretty make up on. I meant get myself emotionally ready … while taking a shower, getting dressed and maybe putting some pretty-pretty make up on.

I took a shower, and was now at my bed still in my towel. What should you wear to a trial? Is there a special trial outfit a person is supposed to have? Should you wear all black … or is that just a funeral thing? I finally decided on a pair of black jeans, black converse, yellow top and a blue woollen sweater. It was good enough, and comfy, and not too funeral-y. I hoped.

I lied on my bed for the next hour or two, waiting for Carly to come and get me. Everything around me was just growing, it was beginning to become too much. Spencer's shooting (Oh, Spencer's fine and out of the hospital, he's still in a little bit of pain, but he has medication for that) Leroy Hamilton getting arrested, (finally) then my dream, which is trying to warn me about Freddie. Like Freddie has ever done anything to me! He saved my life … twice!

A loud honk blared from outside, that meant Carly was there, and I hopped up from my bed and ran downstairs, out the door and into Carly's car.

"Hey," I said, placing my hands on my lap.

"Hi," Carly smiled at me, "So … are you nervous?"

"Completely," I admitted, shifting in my seat a little. I wanted to add that asking if I was nervous to go to the murderer of our friend's trial was a stupid question, but I decided not to.

Suddenly, Carly pulled out the car key.

"What are you doing?" I asked, "We need to go."

"I have a question for you," Carly said, sitting up and turning to face me.

I raised an eyebrow, "Right now? You have to ask me a question right now?"

"Yes," Carly said, I could tell she was very serious, so I sighed and listened, "Why didn't you tell me you liked Freddie?"

I was silent.

"I mean … I'm your best friend, and I thought you would tell me – no keeping secrets anymore, remember?"

I sighed, "I just – well I – I just … I don't know Carly, I don't."

"Yes you do," Carly sighed, "If you're worried that I'm mad, I'm not … just – I'm wondering."

"Well … Freddie was completely in love with you right?" I said, Carly nodded, "And you liked him for a morsel of your lifetime … I was afraid that if I told you that I liked him … you would realize how great he was … tell him that you liked him … and you guys would date, and I could do nothing about it."

"Sam, after I realized I only liked Freddie because he saved my life … I knew I would never like him like that."

"That's what you think! But I didn't tell you, so nothing like that happened! You don't know what would've happened if I actually told you."

Carly sighed, "I still don't understand."

"You don't have to … there's nothing you can do about Freddie's death now."

"I thought you said you'd been seeing him." Carly said, her face ridden with confusion.

I completely forgot that I told Carly about me seeing Freddie … she hadn't brought it up once until now, "I have … he just hasn't been showing up lately."

"Why?" Carly asked.

"I don't know!" I snapped, then I sighed, "Sorry Carly … he just has been gone for the past month, and I'm a little worried."

Carly didn't say anything next, she just turned the car key, and we rode silently to the police station.

LINE

The place was crowded with people, the jury, the judge, people I was guessing were some of Freddie's family, and Spencer was in a far corner. I found myself looking for Ms. Benson, who I hadn't seen in a long time, once I found her I left Carly and went to go sit next to her.

She was dabbing her eyes, and looked like she had been crying for a while now. Her eyes were bright red, and her face was splotchy.

"I haven't cried for him in months … I told myself I was done crying for him," she told me, and I took a hold of her hand, as she started crying again, "Samantha – Sam … thank you, you found him, you found my Freddie's killer … Freddie's soul will be at rest."

Freddie's soul … at rest? Is that why he hadn't been showing up … because I found Leroy Hamilton? If so … why didn't he tell me? Why didn't he let me say goodbye? Now … now I would never see him again … I could be forced to live without him … forever. Why didn't he tell me! Why didn't he let me say goodbye?

I felt like I had to cry … but I couldn't cry now, I could seem weak now.

Ms. Benson and I sat quietly next to each other until the trial started, and everyone took their seats, I found out that the Judge's name was Judge Gordo – nice name huh?

"Order in the court," said Judge Gordo. After that he said a lot of other things – I wasn't really listening, I was just waiting for the end when they declared Leroy Hamilton guilty.

Then, Ms. Benson grabbed my arm tightly, and when I looked up, they were bringing him out, Leroy Hamilton, and the first time ever; I saw the face of Freddie's murderer. He had brown thick hair, and dark eyes. He looked like – how could that be – And just as if she read my thoughts, Ms. Benson whispered:

"He looks a little bit like Freddie."

It was true, the hair, and the eyes, something about the shape of the face, unlike Freddie though he had stubble, because he probably hadn't shaved in a long time. But other than that … there was a strange resemblance to Freddie, and that was the creepiest of all.

"Mr. Hamilton, how do you wish to plead?"

Of course, as another crazy mass murderer who wanted to come free, me, and everyone around me, was expecting for him to say, "Not guilty" because it was usually what people said. Who really wants to go to jail? But no … that's not what he said, and if Leroy Hamilton didn't say "Not guilty" he could only say –

"Guilty."

There was a sudden silence through the whole building. Did he just say … what everybody thought he said? Guilty? He was guilty? Did he really just say that? Oh my god … does he want to be guilty? Well – duh … but … oh my god.

Judge Gordo then continued with the trial, men in grey suits came up and rambled about how this man was a horrible man, deserved to go to jail and Leroy Hamilton just sat there, with a disgusting smirk on his face, like he was happy he was going to be going to jail.

People that I guessed were from Freddie's family started to come up, and speak about how his death ruined their family. I tried to block that out, I didn't need to hear that. But suddenly, Judge Gordo called up Ms. Benson. And my attention snapped up to where she was watching. She was going to talk about Freddie? I didn't think she wanted to talk about Freddie.

"Hello. I'm Marissa Benson, and Freddie was my son," she started, "Freddie was a nice boy, he didn't hurt anyone. He didn't have any enemies, because Freddie was … hard to hate. He was sweet and he was kind. Though maybe I was a little over protective of him, I think he k new I was good mother to him, and that I wouldn't let anything happen to him.

"But … I let this happen to him. I let him … get slaughtered. How am I good mother … if I this happened to my only child? My husband left me soon after Freddie was born…. I've never really been the same since then. But if my husband was here … I wouldn't be alone in this. I wouldn't have to … grovel in despair," tears started to come around her eyes, "But then I remind myself, I am not alone. Freddie had friends, Freddie had family, and they are my friends, and my family as well. We are not alone."

Then she turned to Leroy Hamilton and looked him straight in the eye, "But you. You are alone. You have no friends; it doesn't look like you have any family. And you are sitting here with that … smile on your face. And I don't know how you stand yourself. You ruined a family, you ruined friends, and you can't fix that. So … I am done worrying over this. Because you are going to jail."

Ms. Benson finished, and she dried her eyes, and walked silently over to me and sat down. Then, to my surprise, they called up Carly.

Carly looked pissed as she stood at that podium, and she glared at Leroy Hamilton, whom's smirk just grew bigger.

"You killed one of my best friends, and you shot my brother. And the only thing – the only question running through my mind is why. Why would you do something like this? You ruined lives … hundreds of lives, and you don't seem to care.

"My brother is alive. Though that might be a shock to you, sorry you're little plan was ruined. But my best friend, Sam, she's smart. And she stopped you. She's the reason you're here today. She is everyone's saviour."

Then, even though there was so much for to say, Carly was finished, and she went to sit down. Next I was expecting Spencer to go up, but he didn't. I guess Spencer didn't want to speak about Freddie's death, and his shooting. I know I wouldn't.

"Now Leroy Hamilton would like to speak on his behalf." Judge Gordo said.

My eyes widened. He wants to speak on his behalf? He doesn't have a half … or even a whole! Leroy Hamilton has nothing! He doesn't to "speak on his behalf."

But Leroy Hamilton turned on his microphone from where hew as sitting anyways.

"Hello," he said, his voice filled with too much joy, "There are a lot question circling about me. 'Why did you do this, Leroy?' 'What possessed you to do this?' To answer those questions: I hate iCarly. I wanted it gone, and where now? Gone, it's no more, because I killed Freddie Benson, but that wasn't enough for me. The feeling of killing someone … it's hard to describe. You feel powerful, you feel as if no one can catch you, and boss you around. No one bossed me around. I killed Freddie, and if the Shay's hadn't taken Sam in … Sam would be dead, and if Sam was dead, no one would've been there to save Spencer. And wouldn't be here, and if I wasn't here … I would've been killing little Carly Shay today … about right now. You may think Samantha Puckett is your saviour … but if she was a saviour … why isn't here Freddie here? Now … doesn't that you feel so … powerful?"  
I snapped, I stood up, and I literally heard a snap in my brain, "NO! It DOESN'T make me feel powerful. You know what makes me feel powerful-"

"Miss Puckett, please sit down." Judge Gordo said sternly.

"—The fact that you're going to JAIL. THAT'S WHAT MAKES ME FEEL POWERFUL!" I felt two strong arms wrap around my own, and I started to sob, "SPENCER WAS RIGHT, YOU ARE A BASTARD!" I was dragged out of the court, and left outside the building. I wasn't allowed back in. But I didn't care; I said what needed to be said.

I took the bus home, and I landed on my bed. I was tired, and I just wanted to disappear. For the first time since Freddie's death … I wished that I was dead too.

"Sam."

I jumped up, and I almost choked on my own saliva. How could it be? Why did he come right now?

"Freddie … why the hell are you here?" I snapped.

"It's nice to see you too, Sam." He says with a smirk.

"No time for funny business!" I screamed, "What the hell is the matter with you? Why didn't you come! It's been a whole … freaking month!"

Freddie's face softened at my words, "I wanted to come … I did Sam, I just wasn't allowed."

"Wasn't allowed? That makes no sense. Not one dream, not even the Ouiji board. You said you were always with me. What happened to that? And speaking of dreams … the one I had today was about you. And you were the evil person. Can you explain that?"

Freddie tried to grab her and pull me into a hug, but I punched him away, only I didn't punch him … I went through him.

"See? I'm already running out of time," he whispered, "Sam, you just have to trust me, okay?"

I was hesitant, but I nodded, "Fine, what do you want this time?"

"Take this," he said, holding out a knife, the knife was covered in blood, and I didn't want to take it.

"No," I said sternly, "Why should I … it's creepy."

"Because I need you … to kill yourself."

"And I thought I was the crazy one." I scoffed.

"Sam, this is not funny," Freddie snapped, "This is serious. You do want to help me … right? You do want me to stop appearing to you, and having to change your future, right?"

I looked at him, and I nodded. I didn't want him to disappear, but I did want him to stop showing up, and changing my life. I did want all of this to end.

"Then take the damn knife," he said shoving it towards me.

"Why this knife? Why did you bring me a knife? We have steak knives." I said simply.

"I'll explain that later," then his image flickered before me, and he placed the knife in my hands, still dripping with blood, then, as it left his skin, cuts appeared all over his body, his chest, his legs, his arm, one deep cut in his forehead. It was terrifying, and I almost dropped the knife.

"I have to go. Just die, and then you'll be with me, and we can stop him." Blood was all around him, his blood, and soon to be my blood.

"Him?" I questioned, but Freddie was already gone.

I stared at the knife. And I thought of Carly, who would never be the same without me, I thought of Spencer, and how he would loose his other little sister, I thought of Gibby, who would have to start grieving all over again, I thought of Ms. Benson, and how she called me Freddie's friend. But the thing that I was thinking about the most, the thing that made my heartache, and my brain bash against the side of my skull. The thing that made my breath shorten, and my spine tingle. The thing that made me clench my jaw, and me want to scream. Was that I never got to tell him, how much; I love him.

I held the knife up to my chest, and sighed. The night starts here. And I plunged the knife in.

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**Authors Note  
**By far the longest chapter yet. :) It also just means ... we're getting REALLY close to the end. Possibly two or three chapters left ... the thing is ... we don't know if Leroy Hamilton is sent to JAIL. :O Though it's pretty obvious that he will ... I hope you all liked Marissa and Carly's little speeches, and Sam's outburst. I'm not sure what would happen if something like that happened in a REAL trial. But ... y'know, I'm a 13 (SOON 14!) year old girl, not a lawyer.

Does anyone notice that there's a little bit of a repeat? TWO bits of a repeat in this chapter! Firstly, we have Sam's huge dream, if you go back through the chapters, you'll see that it's the little dreams I made her have, all wrapped up into one, to make one HUGE dream! Also, in the second last paragraph, we had a repeat of the first chapter, when Sam explains how much she loves Freddie.

Also, if anyone has ever heard the song The Night Starts Here by The Stars, then you rock. Because THAT song, is the theme song for this story. Just go onto youtube and listen to it, seriously, it's SUCH a great song.,

Anyways, I hope you liked this chapter ... it took me a little while longer to write it, but I hope you liked it, nonetheless.

Beware of Waffles,  
Emma


	20. Chapter Twenty: The Beast

**The Quiet Scream  
**_A Seddie fanfiction  
_By Emma

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Chapter Twenty  
The Beast

I found myself lying in a bright white room. It looked as if it could go on forever, but I didn't want to walk, I might get lost. For a moment I wondered if I was dreaming, but then I remembered that I killed myself. I killed myself … I committed suicide. I still couldn't believe it.

Where was Freddie? Didn't he say he'd be meeting me? I couldn't really remember … I also couldn't remember where I was after I killed myself. Was I at Carly's?

_Who's Carly?_

She was your best friend, genius.

_Oh right…._

How could I not remember Carly? What was happening to me? Was I drifting away into nothing? Already? I was dead … but I only killed myself minutes ago … didn't I? How long had it been?

"Sam!" called a voice, I couldn't remember it at the moment, but I knew I knew it…. Whose was it?

"Sam! Do not move! Stay _right _where you are, okay?"

I wanted to call out okay, but I couldn't speak. So I just stayed still, the voice sounded so commanding, like it could do something horrible to me if I moved one inch. So I just stayed still until the person came into view. It was Freddie.

Suddenly I remembered everything, Freddie's death, my pain, Freddie showing up, asking me to do things for him … my death. My suicide.

I found my voice, "Freddie?"

He came up to me and took my hands, he felt warm, "Hi," he whispered to me.

I smiled at him; only for a moment I forgot that I was dead. But then it came rushing back to me like a striking pain.

"Are you ready?" he asked.

"Ready for what?" I answered.

Freddie stared at his feet for a moment, "You're going to free me," he answered.

I stared at him like he was crazy.

"What I mean is … you've been wanting to know why this is happening to you … and to me," he started, "Well … I just need your help to defeat him, then I'll be free."

"Free from what?"

Freddie paused for a second, "We'll talk about that when it's necessary," he said quickly, "But first, we need to clear some things up."

I nodded, urging him to go on.

"He's devious, he'll try anything to get you on his side. You just have to not believe whatever he says; he just wants to keep me for his own little game. He's done it before; the other people's very souls were sucked out of their bodies. But I'm here to stop it, and I need your help."

"The knife," I whispered.

"What?"

"You said you would explain the knife to me … now you have to, because I don't know what's coming up next. So you have to tell me."

Freddie sighed, "You're part of me now, because of that knife I used."

"Part of you?"

"It's a … special knife."

"A special knife?"

"In fact … it's the one that killed me."

I opened my mouth to say something, but the words seemed frozen in my mouth. He gave me … the knife that killed him … and I killed myself with that knife, "WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?"

"Sam, calm down." Freddie said sternly.

"NO! HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO CALM DOWN? YOU GAVE ME THE KNIFE THAT KILLED YOU!"

"SAM!" Freddie screamed, "Calm … down."

I let out a shaky breath, calming myself, now was not the time to get emotional. Now was the time to help Freddie, "So … don't listen to him?"

Freddie took my hand, "Exactly."

"Okay then," I said, "Let's go."

The white room faded into black, and then it felt like we were spinning. I held on tightly to Freddie's hand, like if I let go I would fall into oblivion. Once the spinning stopped, I realized that I had my eyes closed the whole time, so I opened them, and was surprised by what I saw.

It looked like we were in a castle. There were stones surrounding us, but there wasn't any doors or windows, just a lot of stones, like we were in a large box made of rocks. There was a small staircase, and up on the stop of that staircase was the most terrifying creature that I could see. He didn't exactly look like a human, though his features were that of a human. His skin was a dull grey, and his eyes were a deep red. He was as tall as two houses, and he was wearing a black suit - don't ask my why, I have no clue.

The beast turned down as stared at me, a strange smile came upon his face, and then he opened his mouth to speak.

"You seriously brought the girl?" he laughed. His voice was dark, and I felt myself shiver just by the sound of it.

"Yes," Freddie said, "I did. Because she can help."

"Haven't I told you, Freddie … that no one can help you?"

"That's what you think."

There was a silence, as the beast took a step, causing the whole building to shake. Suddenly, the beast shrank down to our size, and walked straight up to me.

"Hello, I'm Dunkel," he said reaching his hand out to mine.

I was silent at first, but then I spoke, "I-I'm Sam," I said. I didn't shake his hand.

"I know," he whispered, causing me to once again shiver.

Dunkel walked to my side, and stood beside me, looking up at where he was standing with his arms behind his back, "Tell me, Sam, do you … believe everything that Freddie tells you?"

"Dunkel!" Freddie whispered harshly.

"No, no … I just have to find out what she knows," Dunkel said, putting up a hand to shush Freddie.

"I-I … h-he doesn't tell me … everything," I answered, "Just the things that I … should know."

"Like?"

"Um … my house being broken into, Spencer getting shot."

"He told you about that?"

"No … he just … got me in right place at the right time."

"And why do you think he wasn't telling you those things?"

"Because you would probably hurt him if you knew he did."

Dunkel just laughed, "If I knew?" he said, "Dear girl … I know everything that this boy says. Because we're connecting."

"Stop it!" Freddie cried.

"No, I want to know why you didn't tell her this," Dunkel cooed, "After all, you told me basically everything you've felt about her. Don't you want her to know … everything?"

I turned to Freddie, he told this thing how much he was in love with me? I brushed that off … maybe Dunkel was just … torturing Freddie?

"What do you mean … you two are connected?" I asked.

"Sam," Freddie said with an angry tone, "No."

Dunkel smirked, "Aw c'mon Freddo! She wants to know! Just tell her!"

"No." Freddie said sternly.

"Fine," Dunkel said, his smirk disappearing, "Then I will."

"No you won't!"

"Freddie, you don't have any control over me, I have control over you, and so I'll tell her what I want to tell her. And you can't do anything about that, got it?"

Freddie dropped my and closed his eyes. I stared at him. What was he not telling me? How horrible could it be?

"Here's the thing, cupcake," Dunkel said to me, putting his hand around my shoulder, "Freddie couldn't pass through – y'know pass through, like go to heaven. The reason he couldn't pass through was because I snagged him away, because the other soul I snagged, well, it got destroyed – but that's a whole other story. This story, is that I was having a little fun with your feelings, because I when I snag a soul, I know everything that person has felt, everything that person remembers – it's like I become that person, and since that happens, I can pretty much control that person as much as I want."

Dunkel stepped back and went in front of me now, he was smirking at me as I took all of this in

"Control?" I questioned.

Dunkel walked towards me, and suddenly wrapped his arms around me in a hug, for some reason I didn't pull out of it. He stepped back, his hands still on my arms, then beside me, Freddie started twisting and turning in pain, I shoved off of Dunkel's touch and ran to Freddie's side, on the ground, curled in a ball as something beyond-belief was happening to him. Then, he stopped screaming, and stood up, he walked beside Dunkel, they had the same strange smirk on their faces. And they started talking at the exact same time, their voices mixed together.

"Sam, I love you too, it's not past-tense, it's present. Even when I'm gone through this world, I'm still always with you, I'm still always watching over you. I love you, I wish I told you."

I let out a shaky breath. I knew those words too well. Those were the exact words Freddie had said to me when he told me that he loved me. And I believed him.

Freddie let out a huge gasp of air and dropped to the floor beside Dunkel still, he kneeled there, coughing and gasping for air.

Tears started falling down my cheeks. How could I have been so dense? Freddie didn't love me, this whole time he was probably being controlled by Dunkel just to mess with my mind, forcing Freddie to play along. Freddie probably still loved Carly, and wanted to be with her. I was so stupid. How could I have believed him?

I turned to Freddie and looked him in the eye, he looked up at me, and opened his mouth to say something but then he closed his mouth. He stared at my face, and a long period of time went by without either of us saying anything to each other.

"Sam, it's true that he can control me, but-"

"How could I have believed you? How do you think I'm going to believe you now? This was just some disgusting game he was playing, using you to get to me, this is probably what he does, kills other people with the people he's stolen. It's fine, I understand, you don't really love me; you love Carly. You always have … and you always will."

"That's not true!" Freddie cried getting to his feet, "I told you, you couldn't listen to him, because I knew he would do something like this! You just have to look me in the eye, and see that I'm telling you the truth."

"You really are the monster Freddie," I whispered.

"Sam … please," Freddie pleaded.

"So now, you're stuck," Dunkel said, "You died, and you're here, and you can't get out. Because you can't save him."

I couldn't think straight. I was trapped here … forever? Is that what he meant? It had to be what he meant … he couldn't of meant anything else!

Then Dunkel just turned around and turned back into the giant monster he was, and sat down on a large stone on the top of the staircase. He closed his eyes and then looked as if he was asleep. But I knew he wasn't.

I walked over to a corner of the building and sat down on the floor, leaning against the wall. I felt like crying, but I really couldn't cry and more than I already did. I just felt broken, and tired. So I closed my eyes and dreamt.

* * *

**A Evil Waffle Note:  
_(Whadda think of this? Should I keep it? Do you have a better suggestion?)_**

So. Originally this was the second last chapter, but then I realized it's almost been two weeks since I updated, so I cut it short here. So THAT means, the NEXT chapter is the second last chapter, and then it's the epilogue and then it's ... *sob* over...

Anyways, the reason of my absence is summed up in one word: school. I just started high school, and so I've been busy, plus today I signed up for FOUR clubs ... but I'm sure that won't be a problem in my fanfiction world. Though updates could easily be a week and a half to two weeks apart. But - hey - I used to update once a week in grade seven and eight, and now it's grade nine, so that would be expected. So LIVE WITH IT! XD

So ... yeah. Please check out TWO new Seddie oneshots, one called **The Force of Attraction **and the other is **Do You Love? **And don't forget to REVIEW! :D


	21. Chapter TwentyOne: The Escape

**The Quiet Scream  
**_A Seddie fanfiction  
_By Emma

* * *

Chapter Twenty-One

**The Escape**

**Carly Shay walked up to an old house, with garbage on the lawn from years and years of bad house keeping. She opened the door and walked in.**

** "Sam?" she called, "Sam! Are you home? I have amazing news!" she yelled.**

** Carly ran up the stairs and opened up a familiar door of hers, "Sam, Leroy Hamilton is sent to jail for **_**life**_**! No chance of parole!" she turned and looked behind the door. So her horror, her best friend **_**was **_**here … but she was dead.**

** Blood trailing on her body, a knife was in her hand. Carly's immediately dropped to the floor, sobs forming her chest, she crawled over to her best friend, and touched her hair. Why had she done this? What had happened? Then Carly noticed a crumpled piece of paper on Sam's lap, she took it and unrolled it. Not believing the words it said.**

_**i'm sorry carly but I had to do this**_

**It was Sam's handwriting, and she knew at once this wasn't a murder. Samantha Puckett had killed herself. Carly now felt too alone in the world.**

I awoke with a start. Though I didn't feel rested at all, in fact I felt more tired than I had before. I guess the dead doesn't sleep.

I still had to get used to that. I was dead. My dream must have been how they found me … I had a slight memory of me quickly scribbling that note as I was bleeding from the chest. I remember only addressing it to Carly, because she was the one I was thinking of at the time. But I didn't mean for Carly to find me … I can't believe I just left her alone like that … with no one. Why did I do that? – Oh yeah, because I thought Freddie "loved" me.

Where was Freddie anyways? I looked around the room and found him on the opposite side of the corner I was in, with his head in his arms. He looked pathetic. He was probably still being controlled Dunkel right now. Dunkel was still sitting on the large stone, with his eyes closed. Still probably _not _sleeping, but just pretending.

I sighed, "Is there any bacon here?" I screamed out.

"No," Dunkel said back sternly, still with his eyes closed.

I groaned, and put my head against the back of the wall. For some reason, I was _starving _only I was dead … and there was no good. And I had to stay here _forever_? UGH!

I saw Freddie stand up and start walking over to me, I sighed, now he would try to talk to me now. That's great. Once he reached me, he sat in front of me, and crossed his legs. He stared at me for a moment, and I only glared.

"Sam," he started.

"Don't 'Sam' me!" I whispered harshly, "This is all your fault! Now thanks to you, and stupid, dead _and _heartbroken!"

"I don't you not to listen to him!" Freddie hissed, "And guess what you did? You _listened _to him, and now your pissed at me."

"How do I not know that he was controlling you this whole time? How do I know he's not controlling you right now?"

"You don't," Freddie said simply, "You don't _know _anything, you have you _believe_. Believe me when I say that I really do love you, Sam. I do. He was only controlling me the _first _time you saw me, and one more time when 'I' drove you home after you threw up. Those were the _only _two times that he was controlling me."

"How do I know it's not the other way around?" I said back to him, "How do I know that those two times were the _only _times he wasn't controlling you?"

"You don't!"

"That's such a nubbish response!" I whispered at him.

"Seriously?" Freddie scoffed, "You're _seriously _going to call me a nub _right now_?"

"Yes, I am: nub, nub, _nub_!"

"Sam!" Freddie said to me, "Stop that!"

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"_Yes_."

"Are we seriously arguing like three year olds?"

My eyes immediately started watering, "Don't you understand that you hurt me? Don't you understand that I can't look you in the eye, without wanting to rip your head off?"

Freddie sighed, he took my face in his hands, but I pushed him off, "Sam, I _love _you. You have to believe me. I won't deny that I love Carly, but I love her as a sister. I miss you looking at me the way you used to..."

"You mean looking at you heartbrokenly? That's how I'm looking at you now, Dipthong!" I hissed.

"No … I mean before I died, you would look at me a certain way, it would make me think for just a moment that you may love me back," Freddie whispered.

"I hate you," I whisper.

"No you don't," he whispers back.

"No. I _hate _you."

Freddie's expression softened and then I knew he understood what I was saying. I hate you was our secret code word, it was so secret that we only made it up now. I hate you meant I love you. And not even Dunkel will know that.

"I hate you too." Freddie says. And I know he's telling the truth. Whether or not he truly loves me I'm still not sure. But those three words also form an alliance, so I know that Dunkel is not controlling him right now.

"Can he hear us?" I whispered to Freddie.

Freddie focused for a second, "No, he's in another dimension, but we have to whisper … I'll tell you when he's coming back."

I nodded, "So are we going to get out of this?"

"We're going to try our best."

There was a silence as I was waiting for Freddie to continue on. I raised an eyebrow at him and he realized that I was waiting.

"Well, he has to have a weak spot somewhere, right?" I nodded, "Then we just have to figure out what that is."

"Come on then," I said standing up; I walked over to the stairs and walked up them. Freddie came running up behind me.

"Should we really be doing this?" he asked.

"If we want to get out of here, yes," I answered, rolling my eyes. I started to explore the large space. There was literally nothing on the stone. It was just stones, and more stones. Even if there was something to look for, it would be impossible to find it.

But I didn't give up. My goal was to get Freddie and I here out of here alive. Or at least … die and go to heaven. I walked over to the large Dunkel looking fast asleep. He was still in his suit, and I looked and realized that he had a belt, and on that belt was a small bottle, just normal sized. I motioned for Freddie to come over to me, and he came.

"What do you think this is?" I asked him, pointing to the bottle.

Freddie blinked, "I don't know … but if he has it with him, it must be important. I haven't seen that before and I've been with him … for what seems like an eternity."

"Do you think I can get it?" I asked.

Freddie stared at me, "You want to _climb _on him?"

"Well don't say it like that," I scoffed.

"Still … that will never work."

I took a step forward, and then it all happened.

"SAM!" Freddie yelled.

And then the large hand came flying at me, sending me flying backwards; I hit the opposite wall, and then took the long fall down the floor. My chest started to hurt, and then a deep cut started to form there, and blood started to leak from it.

Dunkel still didn't say anything; he just stared at Freddie and shrunk back down to our side, and then walked down the stairs with him. He commanded Freddie to stand in front of him, and Freddie reluctantly did so. Dunkel simply touched Freddie's forehead, blood started to spew out of him, in at least 50 little cuts. I realized what was happening. We were reliving our pain of our deaths.

Freddie collapsed to the ground beside Dunkel, he wasn't unconscious, but he was too weak to walk.

"You seriously don't understand that you _can't _get out? You won't be able to, you're both under _my _roof, under _my _control," Dunkel said, walking towards me.

I stared at him, and stood up, finding a bit of strength, "You don't control me. Not if I don't let you, and I'm not letting you."

Dunkel smirked, and put his hand on my arm, but I whipped it off, causing his hand to have a little spasm and bleed.

"Do NOT touch me," I said sternly to him.

Dunkel's smirk disappeared, he turned his head and looked at me, "Who the hell are you?"

"I'm Samantha Puckett, and I won't _ever _be controlled by you. You may have convinced me that Freddie may have not ever loved me like he told me. But I still love him," Dunkel backed away, "You tried to get my on your side, but that will never work. You tried to tell me that Freddie didn't love me, but I don't care, because that just makes me love him more. I went _years _thinking he loved Carly, and I still loved him them. The more he hates me, and the more he loves Carly, the more I love him. And I will _always _love him."

Dunkel's eyes widened, he seemed to be panting hard, "I …" he said, "I … will destroy you."

"No you won't," I said, "You're not touching me."

"He used you!" Dunkel screamed, "HE USED YOU! HE'S THE REASON YOUR DEAD!"

"And I love him," Sam said, "That's not going to change."

Freddie stood up, blood still dripping from him, and grabbed onto Dunkel. Dunkel turned to look at Freddie. Then Freddie put his hand on his shoulder, and all his wounds immediately healed.

"You're done, Dunkel," Freddie said, hearing him call Dunkel by name, like they were close friends.

Dunkel turned to look at me with a sad face, then, slowly; he fell into nothing, like he disintegrated right before my eyes. The walls of the stone building fell down exposing just white. Once again Freddie and I were standing in the white room. He walked up to me and took me in his arms, giving me a large hug, and I hugged him back, burying my head in his shoulder.

I walked out of his hands, and lying in the heap of Dunkel's clothing was the small bottle. I picked it up, and Freddie nodded at me to open it. Once I did, two yellow orbs of light floated out and flew into Freddie and me. I immediately knew it was our souls that Dunkel had stolen.

Freddie walked up to me and stared at me straight in the eye, "Sam," he said to me.

"Yes?" I answered.

"I love you."

"You promise?"

"Forever and always."

And then he kissed me.

I knew he was telling the truth, Dunkel was gone, and his soul was back. I couldn't believe I even doubted him for a second, but I'm glad that it was all straightened out now. Once Freddie and I parted, Freddie had a sad look on his face.

"Freddie … what's wrong?" I asked.

Freddie took my hand, "You're not going to like what I'm going to say next."

My heart dropped. What was he saying?

"The reason I gave you my murder weapon to kill yourself with, was because then you would attached to me. You would be a part of me, and once we defeated Dunkel, I would be able to send you back to earth."

"We would go back together … right?" I asked, getting a little frantic.

Freddie sighed, "No," he said, "I would pass through … I would go to heaven, and you would go back to earth."

Tears immediately came to my eyes, and Freddie squeezed my hand tighter. He didn't say anything; he was waiting for me to say something.

"I want to come with you," I whispered.

"No," Freddie said sternly, "Sam, you may not believe it now, but I've seen your life without me. It's not bad Sam, it's not bad at all, you are sad for a bit, yes, but then you find someone, and he's wonderful. You fall for him, and you two eventually get married. You have two kids, and you die happy. Sam, _you die happy_, you don't die because of your hand, you die of old age, happily in your sleep at the age of 101. One hundred and one, Sam, not eighteen."

"I don't care, you are who I want to be with … not this person I don't even know yet!"

Freddie's eyes started to water like mine, and tears started to fall down his face, "Sam … _please_. You have so much to live for."

"_You _are what I live for. You. Not marriage, not kids, not my own life. You. If you're gone, I'm gone, if you die, I die. Freddie … you can't leave me … you can't leave me again. Please, please I'm begging you; let me pass through with you."

"Sam, no, you'll be happy, I _promise _you, please go back. What about Carly … what about Spencer?"

That hits me … what _about _Carly? In this life she's having now, she's probably grieving as much as I was, possibly even more. I stare at Freddie and fall into his arms, and we cry together for a bit.

"Will I ever see you again?" I ask.

"Yes, you will. Once you die," Freddie answers me, "But … I can give you an option: you can go back, and forget that you ever saw me in the first place, or you can go back, and remember this all. Which do you want?"

"I want to remember this," I whisper, "I want to remember that you love me."

"And I do, Sam," he says, "Remember, that I still always love you. And I won't ever leave you. I'll watch you forever; you'll always be by my side. I'll watch over you, I'll be your angel."

"I'll be happy?" I ask through sobs.

"You'll be happy."

"Freddie … I'm going to miss you so much."

"I know," Freddie says, "Sam?"

"Yes?" I answered.

"I love you."

"You promise?"

"Forever and always."

"I love you too."

Then we parted from each other, and Freddie put a long kiss on the top of my forehead. Then, he and the white room start to fade away, as more tears fall down my eyes.

The last way I see Freddie is smiling at me, and waving. I don't hear him, but I see him mouth the words, "I love you."

And I love him.

* * *

**An Evil Waffle Note:**

Did I make you cry? I made myself cry, not gonna joke.

The. Last. Chapter. (Other than the epilogue)

But I forgot to tell you, I have an ALTERNATE ending to the epilogue. So I'll be posting that as well.

Anyways, I don't have much to say about this chapter just ... yeah thanks. And I'll try and have the Epilogue up tonight as well

Emma  
EBWHW


	22. Epilogue

Epilogue

All I can say is that … Freddie was right. I _was _sad at first, and a little depressed, but I got over it. Carly and I were the same, and we even did a monthly web-show, so iCarly wasn't completely over.

A couple months later, Marissa did what she said she would. She adopted a little boy from a local area - because a boy from China or Japan was too much. She named him Freddie … _just _Freddie; because she knew how much Freddie the first hated being called Fredward. He was three years old when he was adopted, and could already walk and talk. He had brown hair, and blue eyes. They were large eyes, and you would instantly fall in love with that boy once you looked into his eyes. He took well to Marissa and Carly and Spencer. But Freddie and I had a special relationship. Every time Carly, Spencer, Marissa, Freddie and I would get together, I wouldn't sit around the table with the three adults; Freddie and I would run off somewhere and play together.

By the time Freddie was ten, he was calling me his sister, his protector and his best friend. And Ms. Benson named me his godmother. Freddie was an interesting little boy, he like jeans and polo shirts, he liked fiddling with video cameras, and making little home videos of Marissa and I. He liked burning them onto CD's to store them for later on in his life, so he could look at them. You could simply put it that he was a nerd, a big fat, dorkwad, and a nub. And I called him those things, and he didn't mind. He found it funny most of the time.

When Freddie was twelve I met a man, his name was Joseph Berry, or Joe, he had to be one of the funniest men I'd ever met. He had black hair and green eyes; he was a little tech-savvy, but he was really a teacher, I was twenty-seven, he was thirty; he had a girlfriend when I met him, but I soon got rid of her. And then Joe was all mine, we dated for three years and then we got married. I kept my maiden name though. I liked Puckett.

Freddie was a real heartbreaker by the time he was sixteen. He had two best friends, in fact, they were two girls, Jamie and Kelly, Jamie was a little … interesting, she called him Fredgeeky, and liked to punch him in the shoulder, and Kelly _obviously _had eyes for Freddie. Freddie admitted to me that he really liked Jamie, but was afraid she thought he was too geeky.

"Listen, nub, a long time ago I knew a boy who was in love with a this girl who was much like Jamie, he was too afraid to tell her … and he blew it. He never got the girl."

When I told Freddie this, he was confused, because I had been married to Joe for a year by then. He thought Joe was the only boy I'd ever had eyes for. Freddie knew about the Freddie before him, he knew that Carly and I had been his best friends; he knew that he was named after this Freddie. But he didn't know that I was in love with Freddie. So that was the day I told him that I was in love with Freddie, and after he died, I had found out that he loved be back – I didn't tell him the full story, I didn't even talk about that story with Carly anymore, I told her I would rather not talk about it.

Joe obviously knew that he was not the only one I loved; he knew I still loved Freddie, and that I would until the day I died. I couldn't tell you which one I loved more, because that would be unfair, because I loved them equally. But if you asked me who the love of my life was, Joe understood that I'd have to say Freddie, because he was. I just missed my chance with him.

Joe and I had two kids, a boy and a girl, Lacy was the girl – she was the oldest – and Nathan, Nathan had a special place in my heart, because he had the first Freddie's middle name, but I did love both my children equally, I guess you could say, Nathan came to me with his love life, and Lacy liked to keep it to herself. But my children were wonderful kids, and they married lovely people, and gave me beautiful grandchildren.

Marissa died when Freddie had just finished university. It was like she said; she wouldn't be able to see her child get married, but she would have experienced the joy of raising a child into the world. Freddie the second was named the godfather of my children, in case something happened to me. Freddie married Jamie, and they had four children. They were all happy, and best friends with my grandchildren. Close to the end of my life, one of my grandchildren and Freddie's children actually got married.

Nothing happened to me; I stayed healthy, and fit – no matter _how_ much meat I ate over the course of my life. Freddie was right. I lived to be 101. And I died. Joe died before me at the 81, it was painful, but I had Freddie. Freddie Benson. He was like my saviour, who came from an orphanage, who picked me up when I was feeling down about the other Freddie. This Freddie came at the exact time for me to fix up my life, and realize that no matter how hard it was, I _could _live without Freddie.

My last moment was spent with Freddie the second. He had come over to my small apartment to spend some time with me and – like Freddie said – I must have drifted off, because when I woke up, I was in a too familiar white room. That white room didn't stay long, I was transferred to a large golden castle, and waiting for me, in a white suit and wings, was Freddie, who couldn't look younger. He smiled at me, and waved. I walked up to him, my wrinkly skin, and my shortened posture. I was old.

"Am I still beautiful to you?" I asked him.

"Sam, you're _always _beautiful," he said, caressing my cheek, and I felt a tingle before me, and then I was eighteen again, eighteen again with Freddie, and that's how stayed for the rest of eternity.

When someone close to you dies, there's always someone who helps you get over that person. It's just because of that one person never giving up on you, or always being by your side that you're always able to get over the pain. I had two, the two angels in my life: Freddie.

**He's there. Then he's not. Am I going insane? Is life torturing me? The only thing I know is that I'm afraid to admit I might be crazy. Because if I'm crazy. They'll take him away.**

**

* * *

**

**An Evil Waffle Note:**

It's over. Seriously. No freakin' joke.

**FairytaleBelieve123, CouldIBeMoreRandom, **musicluvr**, HeCalledHerCass, Invader Johnny, MythScavenger, myjumpingsocks, mustlovepurple, the Stafflord, **12, DESTINY, unkown**, SimonandJeanetteAreBest, **pizzaispurple**, hartful13, MmMmNVM, , Lanter, lovelyMESS, axel100, iLuvNathanKrEsS, StylishCandy, **bubblegumyumyum, CriminalMindsLover, **shadow12795, **Sara**, ilove-sam-and-freddie-seddie, Princess of Destruction99, KarlaRockAngel, Insanely Irish, StarryDreams7, **Bleachfangirl**, Love Story x, Maddie-the-Cattie, Emily McDonald, **tonithefluffy**, Unknown To You All, toughgirl13, **unevergonnaknowme, iforgotmylogininfo, **PsychoticAppleSauce, **it'surbirthdaycomeletsparty, Alexandra Shinai, **Ashlee Seddie, sami2323, BruC, reedoh, **juanita**, xx-SamxFreddie-xx, Seddielovergrl, **troyellaforever**, meljoy, Avatar Rikki, oXLoveMeXHateMeXo PaRaM0rE-0394, **smileyface, **iMaximumPuckett23, **d4nc3iitupgiirl, UKNOWN, seddietwanicochannyzutara, wooooooh-girl, -fan**, IanK24, XxXSeddieFreakXxX, abracadabra94, MadarinWafflesOfSatyness** (WHOO ANOTHER USER WITH WAFFLES IN THEIR NAME! WHOO!) Lolzorz, **Mitchie The Libidinious Nympho, holyshizpickle, seddiefan97, Coyote Laughs, Rain Falls Down, hoperocks98, angelsinstead, mysterygirl123**

Thank you to every single username that is above this. You are all the reviewers of this story. This story has 45 favourites, and 52 alerts, I'm sure I'll get more favourites once I'm done this chapter. ;)

So I just want to thank you one and all for the support you've given me. Because of fanfiction, I now believe that one day, I can be a published author, and I promise you, I AM going to be a published author one day. I have a story I'm writing and I'm planning it as a trilogy. So the more popular I become here, the more effort I give to my writing, and the more I believe I can.

The alternate ending will be up soon - I hope! And I REALLY hope you enjoyed this ending.

Love You Guys,  
Emma  
EBWHW

my twitter: www . twitter . com / bewareofwaffles

my formspring: www . formspring . me / bewareofwaffles

my blog: www . wearenerdshearusroar . wordpress . com


	23. Alternate Ending

Alternate Ending

Epilogue

I woke up in my bed; my hair was a mess, my long curly golden locks. For some reason I bolted upwards and touched them, as if they'd been gone for a long time and I had missed them. But I shrugged and stood up, looking out the window. It was a cold day in Seattle I could tell just by looking outside. It was also rainy, the sidewalks had small puddles on them, and the sky looked as if it would start pouring again at any minute. Suddenly, I got a strange sense of déjà vu, but I shook it off, and went to take my shower.

After was done my shower, I opened up my dresser drawer, taking out a pair of blue skinny jeans, a light purple t-shirt, pulling them on; I brushed through my hair, and then shook my head around like a maniac – that was how I did my hair every morning. Once I was done, I checked my calendar, to cross of the date before this one. Yesterday's date was September 27th, and today's was the 28th.

I paused for a second and stared at that date. It seemed so familiar, I guess that was because I had, had about eighteen other "September 28th's" in my life … but there was something very particular about this date that was catching my attention, though I couldn't quite place it.

Once again, I stood up and looked outside. It was rainy, and cold, and I felt like something was supposed to happen today, something very, very important.

* * *

I sat in Carly's house, waiting for her to come downstairs. We were waiting for Fredgeek, we were supposed to watch a couple movies together – it was Carly's idea. But Freddie was late, so we couldn't even open the cookie dough until he got here.

Stupid nub. Stupid attractive nub – uh, I mean … stupid, stupid, nub.

We waited for another hour before Carly insisted we go to see if he was home, and just forgot. When we walked over to Freddie's door, I got another strange sense of déjà vu. I couldn't have lived this day before … could I? No that was impossible.

Ms. Benson opened the door, and frowned at Carly, she didn't like Carly much since Freddie had gotten into that accident. When we asked her if she knew where Freddie was, she immediately got frantic, saying he was going to get a smoothie, and then heading to Carly's.

We told Ms. Benson to calm down (actually, my words were, "Chill woman!" but that's beside the point) we would all go to the Groovy Smoothie, to see if he was there.

The three of us walked across the street, and entered the door. Another sense of déjà vu swept over me. And for a second, I felt afraid, as if Freddie wouldn't show up. What happened to him if he wasn't there?

Ms. Benson let out a harsh, "Freddie!" and ran over to a boy at a table, the boy turned around.

"Mom!" Freddie said, "What are you doing here?" he asked.

"We were looking for you, Freddie!" Carly cut in, "We were supposed to meet to hang out today, we went to see if you just forgot and went home, but Ms. Benson said you left over two hours ago. So we came here."

"Oh right…" Freddie mused, "Sorry, I was talking to Gibby," he said pointing his thumb over to Gibby himself, "I lost track of time." Then he turned and made eye contact with me. And I remembered it all.

**"Fredward was murdered."**

_**"Sam..."**_

__**"****You d-died!"**

**"Sam, I'm here. I'm not dead. Just look at me. Do I look dead to you?"**

**Was yesterday a dream?****Could****it have been a dream?**

**"Don't you miss him too, Carly?"**

"**'Course I do. But I know that Freddie wouldn't want us like this, wallowing in the nothingness because he was gone. He would want us to be happy. To laugh. To smile."**

**"No I can't look at you either, because that hurts too much! I can't be with you, because it hurts TOO MUCH!"**

**"I'm hurting you."**

**"Sam . . . you're okay, right?"**

** "Y-yeah, I'm fine."**

"**Go with the flow, whatever happens, it has to happen. It's real."**

**"Freddie, I love you, I always have."  
"Sam, I love you too, it's not past-tense, it's present. Even when I'm gone through this world, I'm still****always****with you, I'm still****always****watching over you. I love you, I wish I told you."**

**"I'm so glad you're finally starting to live again!"**

**Yeah . . . live, that's an interesting word.**

**A picture I had on my wall. It was a picture of Carly, Spencer, Freddie and I about a year ago. We were all smiling, with our arms around each other. It was gone. My picture was gone. I couldn't believe it. My house had been broken into.**

**Y-E-S-H-E-I-S-Q-U-I-T-E-I-M-P-O-R-T-A-N-T-I-N-D-E-E-D**

"**Only you can hear my quiet scream,****  
****Because the blade has a incentive scheme,****  
****The slayer is more imminent than you think,****  
****Just promise me not to blink,****  
****This is not a trance,****  
****Just give love a chance,****  
****Then maybe you'll see,****  
****What would be."**

**"No, Carly, no. I****love****him, as in I wanted to kiss him, as in I wanted him to be my boyfriend. And now he can't, because he's DEAD! How do you think I feel, huh? How am I supposed to get over someone, who I love, and I'm never****going to see again?"**

**"STOP RUNNING FROM ME!"**

**"Have you ever thought that maybe****I'm****protecting you from something?"**

**A glitter of light, forming to a shape, a shape of . . . Freddie. There he was, standing before me. It was slightly translucent, due to the fact that he****wasn't****really there. And he smiled at me, and for the first time in a long time, my heart melted. This was Freddie, this was****my****Freddie. Not the creepy one that had been around me for so long. This was Frednerd. This was Freducinni. This was Benson. This was my Freddie.**

**It's the worst thing anyone could ever go through, the most terrifying thing, and the most silencing. It's like you want to scream, but you can't, because everything around you is so quiet.**

**"Did you suffer?"**

**"Yes. He made sure of it."**

**"F-Freddie! I-I'm do-one! I c-can't do thi-is anymore! Just-t ple-ease, make i-it s-stop!"**

**"I would if I could Sam, I would if I could."**

"**Any last words, Spencer Shay?"**

**"You are a bastard."**

**"Sam, I-I saw . . . F-Freddie. . . . I saw Freddie."**

**My picture. It was there. Only one thing was different about it. Freddie's face had an "X" through it; Spencer's face had an "X" through it. My face was circled.**

**"Carly? Please, you have to believe me."**

**"I-I do. I can't believe it, but I do. I believe you, Sam."**

**"Sam … that was Officer Ferris. They found him, they found Leroy Hamilton."**

"**But my best friend, Sam, she's smart. And she stopped you. She's the reason you're here today. She is everyone's saviour."**

"**You may think Samantha Puckett is your saviour … but if she was a saviour … why isn't here Freddie here? Now … doesn't that you feel so … powerful?"**

"**The fact that you're going to JAIL. THAT'S WHAT MAKES ME FEEL POWERFUL!"**

**I held the knife up to my chest, and sighed. The night starts here. And I plunged the knife in**.

**"Hello, I'm Dunkel,"**

**"Sam, I love you too, it's not past-tense, it's present. Even when I'm gone through this world, I'm still always with you, I'm still always watching over you. I love you, I wish I told you."**

**Tears started falling down my cheeks. How could I have been so dense? Freddie didn't love me, this whole time he was probably being controlled by Dunkel just to mess with my mind, forcing Freddie to play along. Freddie probably still loved Carly, and wanted to be with her. I was so stupid. How could I have believed him?**

**"I hate you,"**

**"No you don't,"**

**"No. I **_**hate **_**you."**

**"Sam?"**

**"Yes?"**

**"I love you."**

**"You promise?"**

**"Forever and always."**

**Freddie put a long kiss on the top of my forehead. Then, he and the white room start to fade away, as more tears fall down my eyes.**

**And I love him.**

It took all my might not to run up to him and tackle him to the ground. So I just stood there, as Carly Freddie and Marissa talked. Eventually Marissa and Gibby left, and Carly and I only stood.

"I-I'm going to get a smoothie, I'll meet you two there," I say to Carly, hopefully getting Freddie's attention.

"Okay, c'mon Freddie," Carly calls.

"I still have to pay, Sam and I will meet you there, start the movie for us,"

Carly stared at the two of us, "Uh … yeah, okay, bye." Then she left, awkwardly.

Freddie and I immediately walked up to each other, speechless, not knowing what to say. It was I who spoke first.

"I thought … I thought I was going to have a happy life without you," I said, a wide smile spreading across my mouth.

"He decided that it wasn't my time of death … just yet," Freddie explained.

"What about my to-be husband?" I asked.

"You stole him from another chick anyways," Freddie said with a shrug.

"Freddie?" I asked.

"Yes?" he answered.

"I love you."

"Forever and always?"

To answer his question, I kissed him, a long kiss that told him that I was here, and so was he, and that nothing could separate us from now on. We were with each other, and that's all that mattered.

**He's there. Then he's not. Am I going insane? Is life torturing me? The only thing I know is that I'm afraid to admit I might be crazy. Because if I'm crazy. They'll take him away.**

**

* * *

**

**An Evil Waffle Note:**

Finally! I finished it! It took a little while longer than I was thinking, but now it's done! And this was my second option as an ending.

I'll tell you _why _I chose the first ending as the real ending. It was because I brought up the fact that Ms. Benson wanted to adopt. I realized that if I was going to put _that _in I couldn't just leave it alone and completely forget about it! So that's why I put the other ending, and it's still my favourite, because still even in the end Sam and Freddie are together. :)


End file.
